Blake Fielder-Civil has admitted introducing tragic ex-wife Amy Winehouse to heroin for the first time.
The singer’s former husband made the admission on Jeremy Kyle’s TV show where he appeared with mum Georgette and girlfriend Sarah. Blake confessed he was responsible for getting the Back to Black star hooked on drugs – but said he takes solace in the fact she was killed by alcohol. The ex-con said: “I’ve admitted that I was there when she did it the first time, yeah, it was my doing. I don’t know if she ever experienced it without me. The fact that makes it easier is alcohol was what killed Amy.”
Blake recalled Amy’s first experience with heroin, telling viewers: “I'd taken it about three or four times, we were in a hotel in East London and I think I had about £10 of heroin with me, which is something I used to do after a club. I was smoking it on foil and she said, 'Can I try some?' I think I might have put up a weak resistance, the fact is whatever I said she did end up having some."
And he admitted that he was filled with regret about that fateful moment: "That goes without saying, of course. I have to be really conscious about what I say because I don't want it to seem that I'm shirking responsibility. The fact is that of course I regret it; not only just because of the damage it's caused Amy and the loss of her life and the damage to her family, but also to my family and also to me. We've all gone through this addiction."
He also claimed that he and Amy – who died on July 23, 2011, aged just 27 - only used drugs for four months of their relationship. When quizzed on whether it was love that fuelled their romance or just addiction to drugs he was quick to play down their usage of substances. He said: “Some people don’t know or don’t realise that as far as using heroin or crack goes – I mean the cocaine was recreational to be honest – out of the maybe six or seven-year relationship that me and Amy had on and off, there was drug use for about four months.”
Blake said that for him, when he went to prison, was when things took a turn for the worse. He revealed: “It got a lot worse while I was in jail, when I got out I was told if I loved her I'd divorce her so I did. We agreed it would get everyone off our backs, but we'd probably re-marry. I was still in love with her.”
And Blake opened up about how he reached a turning point when their drug usage started to have a more negative effect. He said: “It started to hurt me and it was more heart-breaking to see. She had a seizure and was taken to hospital... I put her on her side and called an ambulance. It was due to cocaine, when it happened I burst into tears, I was completely beside myself. It was the worst part of my life being with somebody that I love, having the opportunity of total happiness but being in complete misery."
Blake also told how he found out in prison that Amy had died. He revealed: "The officers opened the door and said can you come with us. One of the seniors asked me a few questions, like if I was still married to Amy. Then he said Amy died earlier that day. For two or three minutes I was a bit pathetic, saying, 'It won't be Amy it will be someone that looks like her or a hoax.’ I made them show me six or seven websites. Each time I found it harder and harder to take on. I broke down and couldn't stop crying. Then I was put back in the cell. I had a good cell mate. He'd watched it on the news; he was crying and gave me a hug when I got back."
And Blake admitted that prior to Amy's death the couple had been in touch and were planning a reconciliation - despite the fact he had a new girlfriend and a son. He confessed: "When I got discharged there was text messages on my phone from Amy. I don't know when they were from but there was one talking about being a godmother to Jack, we'd spoken about her visiting me and had an emotional phone call about how we were thinking about maybe getting together. She said her doctor had said, ‘You're never not going to be in love with Blake.’ I'd written her a letter saying I don't know what we'll do, I'll always love you."
And when Jeremy said "The last words she said to you were 'You'll never lose me?'" Blake simply replied "yeah”."
Feb 27 2013
[pictured: Amy & Blake in happier times]
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