It's way worth the $10 a month fee and seriously has been a life saver for me the past few days.
Now my mind is just so like all over the place. I think one thought and my mind races over to another thought its crazy! I think it's normal for someone within recovery to experience that feeling.
There's just so much in my life going on around me that it's hard for me to process it. I guess those who are really close to me are having problems within their own lives, own vices, and own mental things and I blame myself for it.
Last night I had the hardest time in a really long time sleeping. I've always had insomnia but while I was doing oxy everyday that would pretty much cure the insomnia. lol
and now i'm like fuck here I am again wide awake, and the bad part about it is that when I fall asleep at 8 am in a xanax daze I don't wake up for till like 5pm. I wake up like wtf i just missed my whole day.
The only good thing that comes from that is not doing oxy. Honestly I don't give a fuck what my sleep schedule is like or just sweat the small stuff in general as long as I'm not using i'm straight.
Also I wanted to add that my physical withdrawals haven't completely gone away. I guess I was expecting it all to go away by now. Physically anyway. But I'm still getting these bad chills and I hate it. I think it's the epitome of "cravings"
On a positive note though, I went to Yoga tonight. I hadn't been in over a year but i'm so ready to start doing it regularly again! It's sooo close to my house and 1 yoga class is half the price of 1 oxy. You do the math...