Boredom is egos largest enemy

By Pjotr777 · Feb 19, 2019 · ·
  1. Pjotr777
    Boredom is egos largest enemy.

    Why? Try it yourself: sit in lotus posture if possible for about 10 minutes and focus only on your breath. You might feel it under your nostrals or in the back of the nose, maybe in your throat or all the way down to your lungs and belly. As long as you follow your breath with gentle precision. Sooner or later you will notice that you were distracted by thoughts, feelings, sensations, emotions, pain, anxiety, noises etc. When you realise this, gently congratulate yourself for being aware of the distraction, if it helps to label it as “hey I was thinking again”, do it. And then with gentle precision shift the focus back to your breath. If it’s not thoughts that distract you but (mental) pain (it’ takes part in the same brain region anyway),
    Do the same: “hey I am thinking”. That’s what our brain is designed for.
    This is a never ending process. Ten times, hundreds of times, thousands of times you keep on gently focussing your attention on your breath with equanimity and loving-kindness.

    To be honest, doing absolutely nothing more than that, is the toughest job I ever had. The pain I had to endure during 47 years of bullying, emotional neglect, other forms of abuse and a decomposing body, is nothing compared to this. I tried do escape and numb the pain by all means. For some reason I got addicted to ketamine after the first injection. It was a different reality. Fortunately thanks due to infamous “k-pains” I got off of it. Cocaine, alcohol, heroin and many other substances and pharmaceuticals have passed their way into my system only to postpone execution: reliving the memories, process it and getting rid of it forever. Radical acceptance can lead to an instant alleviation of suffering even though the pain remains the same.
    Its not an easy way but I think this is the only sustainable way out of trauma.

    “Not a réminiscence but rather a réviviscense, as the French psychiatrist Jean Delay has formulated it” (LSD my problem child, Albert Hofmann, page 42)

    The path is the goal.


    Pjotr777

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    Written by: Pjotr777, Feb 19, 2019, Boredom is egos largest enemy, PLANIT

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Comments

  1. Pjotr777
    I still cant edit and I wanted to clarify that emotional and physical pain activate similar brain regions.
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