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Recovery and addiction

Add your Addiction & Recovery tales

  1. I am sick of myown addiction

    I have finnally reached the point where I am sick of myown drug abuse. I have basically no veins left, I do not get high anymore.It just gets worse. I am in a really dark place at the moment (That is the reason of my dissapearance from DF for a while) and my addiction has gone totally out of controll. I hate this intoxicated feeling my body has, like it would be full of something really sickening.Besides, my skin has strange reactions and I guess, I have to check my liver. I guess, I will...
  2. No sob stories here please

    A little light hearted tale of one girls unfortunate miss rate and attempt to come off the big H.
  3. Addiction, mental disorder and families

    An article discussing the relationship between addiction and mental disorder, aimed at the families of those who have a comorbid diagnosis for the purpose of their developing a greater understanding of the issues.
  4. I'm having pains in my penis after quitting smoking weed... will I be okay eventually?

    Hi, my name is Robert. I'm 18 years old and I'm currently going to college to study music. I'm just now getting into my second semester and it has been 8 days since I last smoked marijuana. To be honest, I've been wanting to do this for a very long time. I've taken few day breaks here and there, but I always get suckered into smoking again. I've been smoking weed chronically for the past year and half, and it has for sure taken a tole. My short term memory is terrible, I have to focus so...
  5. health problems, considering taking a pause and why I do not like Christmas season.

    I guess, that I am going to take a pause, because my drug abuse has reached that point when, if I do not stop for a while, it is going to cause serious health problems ( If I do not have them allready).My both arms hurt from shoulder to fingers ( Sometimes even from the side of neck to fingers). I guess, I have managed to damage both nerves (and this is the least terrifying from my guesses). There are hot and numb spots on my arms and my only somehow useable vein is close to collapsing once...
  6. Opiate detox day 15 using lofexidine. With drug history. LONG READ!

    I've never wrote a blog, but I'm detoxing and having a rough time, so maybe this could offer some distraction, or an embarrassing read in the future. I've been a drug user since I was 12, I'm now 31 and this really bothers me! It started much ealier than 12, an older friend would go on and on about how amazing weed was or the weekend and the E tabs she'd consumed, I was 9 and fascinated with drugs from her stories, however I had no access apart from my dads weed I knew were it was hidden,...
  7. Nothing usefull

    That moment when one of your common friends say that the fact that two craziest people he knows ( meaning me and my husband) can be togeather for such a long time in spite of being total nutcases actually gives hope for a lot of calmer people.I just find it funny. In my eyes, my husband is the most normal person I know. I am doing quite good. Usage has lessened. Will see how it is going to be in future. Not much sense in this post, i know.
  8. A Random Update

    Hey everyone. It's been a while since I've been active on here, mostly because things have just been wild the past four months. However, I think now is a good time as any to come back and start using DF as a resource again, because I could use the outlet, information, and support. Posting here and contributing to the forums has helped me a lot in the past, and I can use all the help I can get now. At the end of August I moved hundreds of miles away from my hometown to attend a...
  9. Well, this sucks...

    Why did I lie to myself? I'd been there before. IV heroin use, popping morphine pills on a daily basis, I'd climbed pretty far up the opiate ladder, although I only ventured once into the potentially deadly realm of fentanyl abuse. I don't have the patience to work put those doses, I know that, for me, fent and it's many analogs would be nothing but suicide. Anyway, I'd taken a lot of different opiate/oids. There had been good times, bad times and everything in between. Seeing as...
  10. Showing gratitude it took too long. To everyone who isn't here.

    Saw the "attitude of gratitude what are you grateful for" thread today. I thought of this but didn't want to post this in the thread because it was really real and really long - taking LSD tonight I want nothing left of dead weight in my life that was driving me to do the same types of things I felt remorse for. felt bad about managing to get arrested for possesion at 12 so naturally after that I constantly bought drugs as much as I could it's a wonder I have avoided another arrest. I have...
  11. The never ending inner fight

    You know these moments when someone from whom you really have not expected it, says something that makes you stop and think? Few days ago this happened to me. My husband said me to stop, because he is affraid that it is only a matter of half of year and I will not be there and he does not want to lose me. It is strange to hear it from him, because he is addict as well, besides, I thought that I am doing better now. I guess, I am not. But I am trying. I do not have illusions that...
  12. Relationships, love and quitting

    "Can't believe you were once just like anyone else Then you grew and became like the devil himself Pray to God I can think of a kind thing to say But I don't think I can So fuck you anyway So fuck you anyway So fuck you anyway So fuck you anyway So fuck you anyway So fuck you anyway Bet you sleep like a child with your thumb in your mouth I could creep up beside, put a gun in your mouth Makes me sick when I hear all the shit that you say So much crap coming out, it must take...
  13. The denial of Cannabis Addiction.

    Why is there this trend, this force, in 'stoner culture', to deny any harms of cannabis, especially its addictive potential? It essentially amounts to glorification, which no one who believes in harm reduction should tolerate. There are many reasons for this. Doubtless it is a reaction to the decades (bordering on centuries now) of slander hurled at Cannabis and its users by politicians and the religious right-wing. The now infamous 'reefer madness' (1936) propaganda hatchet job of a film...
  14. Sobriety has made me realize I don't have to be afraid of love!

    For those of you who know me.. my name is Brad. I will keep this short and sweet as I am way too excited right now. Just got off work.. had an amazing shift. I was on cloud nine and I didn't even need to take any modafinil. I am 19 days clean and sober from heavy methamphetamine use. I have used on and off for 10 years but this last time I relapsed was the worst. I mean before I signed up to these forums I had binged everyday for 3 months. Methamphetamine is the only drug that.. I am either...
  15. Mind over Matter, Will Dominates Urge!

    BLOG POST #2 8th September, 2016 Pri Drug: Methamphetamine (Smoke) First use: March '14 - July ’14 Second use: June ’15 - Dec ‘15 Third use: June ’16 - Sept ‘16 Current: Coming down Other Drugs: Caffeine (Coffee, Energy Drinks, on & off for 8 years) Current: Sober for 12 hours Alcohol (Bourbon, Beer, on & off for 7 years) Current: Sober for 7 weeks (although 1 or 2 drinks once a week) Nicotine (regular smokes, on & off for 8 years) Current: Sober for 6 months...
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