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  1. I_MISS_160s
    WE DON'T ALWAYS THINK, BEFORE WE ACT,
    BUT JUSE REMEMBER, YOU CAN'T GO BACK...
    WHAT MAY SEEM SO RIGHT,COULD TURN OUT ALL WRONG...
    WHAT'S DONE IS DONE, END OF SONG...
    SO ALWAYS REMEMBER, BE FAIR AND TRUE,
    THE CONSEQUENCES ARE FOREVER, FOR YOU AND WHO...?



    Addiction and selfishness, Dependency and damage.....

    When you are such a serious addict for so many years, to drugs like OxyContin and dope, you tend to lose sight of you dreams and your hopes...

    But that's not the worst of the things about addiction that have scarred my soul inside and out. It took way too long, to figure all of this shit out..

    Family, Friends, co-workers..... It doesn't matter. In this addiction I have hurt them all. Lying about my condition to someone who loves, respects, and trust is an abomination to my self worth and character. Worrying the closest family day after day, drug after drug, arrest after arrest.

    Stealing from those who trust you with there helpless of children. These things have damaged my soul to where the wounds are deep, seated, and painful...

    Its now that the addiction, which made me all of I shouldn't be, is more under control than ever before that the wounds in my soul seep and ache as if some spiritual stitches have been ripped out and salt has been dumped in....

    How do I heal the heart that aches from my sins, the only way I know how is the hypodermic needles and pins.

    The struggle is real, painful regret is (MY) deal. How long if ever does madness like this take to heal?

    It's amazing how some shit can get so very very real.

Comments

  1. SublimeTrip
    So true. Very enjoyable... Share more with us, my friend.
  2. I_MISS_160s
    Thanks for the comment. I am just waiting for some good graces from above to hopefully allow me to be able to do what I need to make a new blog entry. It's written, waiting, thus also not going anywhere. It's safe. Addiction still causes me to cause and/or allow negative shit to happen to this day.
  3. scholastica
    Very eloquent.
    Confession is good for the soul, it opens the conduit to the graces you seek.
  4. DazedforDays
    That some deep stuff right there, but very real. Unfortunately every last one of us addicts has experienced some, if not all of the scenarios you described. If we weren't addicts bad things wouldnt have arisen due to our substance use, we would just be drug abusers. And even though we know the bad things will continue to happen, we still use anyways...

    Great entry man, really makes you think about what you've done in the past so hopefully there is no repeating in the future.
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