Swim's younger brother convinced her not to smoke anymore. So she threw out the American Spirits. Now swim wants to start smoking because swim is at home a lot and bored...there's not enough to do around the house. Swim can't drive.
Swim has been doing too much xanax. The xanax gets rid of all the anxiety, swim can feel normal but everything starts feeling like a drag.
Although swim is calm, the motivation for going to film school and everything has sort of left.
This is terrible. Swim is thinking of moving to LA in the fall and this almost is starting to feel ridiculous.
Although, swim has been much more stable now. There are no problems with hearing interference in people's talking or on the radio. Swim is upset for no reason at all. There's nothing to kill the pain.
Swim took Vicodin and it made it all go away and wants it back. Also, it made the anxiety go away- weird huh. Well why does swim have so many issues. Swim hasn't done drugs before so the issues almost seem to be a lack of good drugs...maybe she'll try mdma therapy!!!!
Swim is journaling in a book she got for a dollar almost every day since she got home.
It's helping a lot. Swim may try to make LSA out of morning glories in the future. But is this a good plan for someone with a diagnosis of schizophrenia? Not sure...
Swim is getting a story published and is happy about that....other than that....we are getting a new puppy and that is all that's on swim's mind. Life is good, and sux at the same time.