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  1. Mick Mouse
    I am thinking about leaving the forum. I have not yet decided completely though. The original reason I joined has been left far, far behind, never to rear its ugly head again. And while I would like to think that I have been able to offer some small contributions over the years, I have been questioning the usefulness of those contributions lately.

    I feel as if I no longer have anything worthwhile to contribute. My experiences are not unique, countless members here have had the same or similar things happen. The information I have to offer can be found in a number of other places, or even through other members, such as Al-k-mist and others here.

    Should I leave while I am at the top of my game, or hang around like an old relic, until I drift off into obscurity? Maybe go the way of midget porn and the Blood Ninja.....only remembered by the really OLD members, and even then, in passing.

    A big part of it is time, as well. I do not seem to have the time to devote to the forum like I once did, but maybe that is just me.

    Another thing is energy. I find myself staying away from those places in which I could possibly make a difference, for the simple fact that the goddamn kids just will not fucking learn! You give the same advice and information over and over again, and each and every day, some fucking kid has done something stupid and we all get to read "Need help ASAP!" or "just done a shitload of _____ and never did it before. Am I going to die?"

    Fuck yes, you fucking moron! We are ALL going to die sooner or later! How fucking stupid can you be?

    How many times do you have to say We are not doctors. Go to the hospital if you think you did too much or are having problems. Start small and go up from there. We don't identify pills/ powders/ capsules here. Don't incriminate yourself. Blah, blah, blah.

    I never suffer fools, much less gladly. And there will always be more foolish people than there will be of those who get the picture. This has gotten me censored here more than a few times, as I say what I think and feel, quite often without regard to what you might think or feel.....which is as it should be. Getting censored I mean, and not my attitudes!

    My recreational use of drugs is non-existent these days, and has been that way for years. My medical use of drugs is dwindling, as I increasingly cut more and more from my regimen and move back towards a more natural and chemical-free lifestyle. My philosophy on this is simple-before I started adding all of these chemicals to my body throughout the years, I was young, strong, and healthy. If I remove all of the chemicals from my body, I should return to that state. Well, not young, but everything else!

    At least that is my hope, because all a lifetime of drug use has ever gotten me is damaged relationships, failed dreams, and broken promises.

    Poor health.

    Brain damage.

    The list can go on and on.

    The sun is setting and the horse is saddled. All I have to do is mount up and ride off into the sunset.

    Into obscurity, with the rest of those whose dreams were greater than their skills.

Comments

  1. Beenthere2Hippie
    No. Please don't do that. You're a valued member who has so much to offer, regardless of how little time you can afford to give. You were my first contact when I came to forum. I'll never forget, ever. The first one to welcome me and let me know I wasn't alone. Just as you said above, kids will always ignore the words of those who are older or wiser. Nothing has changed throughout the centuries and I'm sure in that way never will. But still, we seek to make a difference, one person at a time. Some we help, some we don't. You've helped many, many over that time.

    If I draw a line in the center of a sheet of paper and make two lists, one of the positive offerings members like you can make on DF and the other of the negatives that you face doing so, which do you think would be longer? The positive reasons, I believe.

    Even though you're tired of the grind and don't have enough energy to spend time chasing after young members who don't seem to know better any longer, when something moves and compels you, few can as eloquently argue the point better on paper than can you, for you are a formidable force.

    So you don't want to mess with the daily grind of the forums--then don't. But do stay and read and lend your opinion and insight when you feel so moved.

    Interest in internet forums rises and wanes, like the tides, for us all--especially we older members. Why not just give yourself permission to do only what you can and want to do and nothing more and see how it goes? You will never be an addict again, but you will always be a warrior of the battle...that is a valuable asset that I hope you choose to continue to share us all as you have over these many years of service to this site.

    Much love and good wishes,

    BT2H
  2. Joe-(5-HTP)
    I don't think there's anything wrong or unsurprising for DF to start featuring less significantly in a members life. Whose to say whether this is permanent though?
  3. Mick Mouse
    @BT2H-older for sure, but not too sure about wiser! And it is not necessarily just about the newer members and/or their inability to see the truth. The truth is that I feel that I have become judgemental, rather than helpful. And that does nobody any good.

    The problem is that I am addicted. Addicted to D-F. I don't feel right unless I log on each day and see what is going on. And I don't WANT to kick this addiction! But I am ready to let others take my place in line. Ready to let others pick up the sword and shield and carry on the fight. I just do not know how to stop.

    @Joe-agreed. And most wisely stated!
  4. rednana
    Hey St D N,
    I'm a newbie AND an old relic, turning 55 in a few weeks. Ive found a new addiction that may help me combat my long term compulsion to smoke cigarettes...yuk filthy shit...but still I do it without much thought for consequences... as the little voice in my head chants...ya goin die from cancer na-nana na na na-na! !
    I'm finding myself completely sucked into the forum, my favourites being anything cannabis related, prescription meds of the mind altering kind (I work with people with Mental Health issues) and have taken anti d's at times.

    What this means for me is, Im too busy reading & typing, so seem to be smoking less....really cant do all that on a MOB & smoke.

    I laughed at you comments re; the young dudes with wings like a shield of steel...& limited attention to obvious consequences.
    I joined this site knowing full well my intrepid past, feeling grateful to be alive, I thought to myself....I can contribute here.
    In the short time I've been here I have read some posts and thought ...."oh your as dumb as dog shit"...OR....well there ya go ..."ya cant fix stupid"...but you can't train someone in common sense.

    I think I'm learning more from the young dudes...but it scares the crap outta me...how many ways there seem to be to die unintentionally.....and f**k me....they've got them ALL covered.


    I to, do not suffer f'ing fools gladly, & have had deep & meaningfuls with my boss about my attitude....Im a ....wait for it....Disabilities Advocate....a-hum.
    I hope this message reads ok...working off 4" MOB screen with 54 year old eyes.

    I hope you stick around, at least casually as I've not had the chance to engage in good old fashioned verbal intercourse.
    Cheers for now rednana...ps impressive albums ...yeeeaaaahhhhhh !!:D:D
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