This day felt like it would never come.. From the whisperings in my ear from a special agent with the DEA telling me what a big deal I am as the cold steel from the barrel of his gun made its impression in the side of my temple as I laid peacefully surrendered on some random persons front lawn, to the awkward day I was released from prison, my ride being the same beautiful girl who dropped me off, the only difference being my feelings towards her; she cheated on me on Valentines day earlier that year. That awkward ride to the half-way house was over 3 years ago.
It has been a long time since that initial day in 2004 that landed me in trouble with nearly every federal agency that existed at the time, short of the CIA. My dad may have summarized it best when he said that everyones does illegal shit, and that some people are unluckily, and get caught. In my case, he said, I rubbed their faces in it.
I have been absent from the board for the past few months. No real reason. World of Worldcraft.
I don't know where my life is headed from here on out. I do know my son is the most important aspect of my life, but with him in Florida, and me in NY.. it's difficult to enjoy life knowing that I am missing him so much. Playing digital dad a few times a week on Skype just isn't fulfilling. Now that I am free to travel, I have to worry about someones feelings getting hurt. Someone who I love and care about, but someone who has made me a priority when she should be making her own children a priority.
So in approximately 4 hours and 20 minutes, I will be free as that bird.. yet somehow, someway, I still feel very much stuck.