When I was 23 years old, I went out with one of my best friends from back home. She had been one of my best friends for a number of years and we always had a blast. One summer night, we were out doing the usual bar-hopping from one small town to another until we ended up in a little town called Snortsin. We stopped at the bar on main street and had a couple more beers. Up to this point we hadn't found much excitement, but regardless had managed to get pretty buzzed. The bar in Snortsin was no different and if I remember right it was dead inside.
While we were in the bar, an ex-boyfriend of mine called the bar. I got on the phone somehow and he asked if we wanted to come out to a party he was at.
(First let me explain this ex of mine. He was my first love, and we had an ongoing fling for like 6 years. He pretty much used me for sex and I allowed it to happen in hopes that he would eventually want me back...It made me feel shitty every time to say the least).
Anyway...my current boyfriend at the time (and future 2nd husband) was out of state on a road trip with his friends...so I saw no harm in taking my ex up on his offer to go to the party he invited us to.
We were very drunk before we even stepped out of the bar to find this party. I have no idea how we even found the house. Neither of us had ever been there before. Once we got there it was obvious that this was just a small party. We went in and before long I lost my friend. She went somewhere and I was sitting on a couch in some living room. I remember a table nearby with a light hanging over it and a couple of people playing cards at the table, one of them being my ex.
As I sat on that couch I remember the room started to spin and I wanted to pass out. I felt like it was a bad idea going there and wishing that I wasn't so drunk. I felt stupid in front of my ex, and I was stuck sitting on that couch in the middle of nowhere, and my friend was nowhere to be found.
That's when my ex-boyfriend hollered over at me and motioned me to come over to the table. I remember him saying..."Here come do this and you will feel better".
That was it. With those words...an opportunity presented itself. An opportunity presented to me by someone I wanted desperately to please. An opportunity to look cool and not a chicken shit. An opportunity to "feel better".
He handed me the pen that had both ends cut off and pointed at one of the white lines of powdery stuff and said " snort one of these". I don't remember questioning what it might be or what it would do. I don't remember asking how to do it. I just remember picking up that little plastic tube, putting it to my nose, bending down to the table and inhaling a line up into my nose.
It was pretty strong stuff whatever it was. It burned up into my nose and into my cheek and up into my eye. My eyes were watering but I could have cared less. It was intense and so quick. Suddenly I felt something throughout my whole body, my whole being.
The only words that came to mind in that moment were..."Oh my God, I found it".
I was beyond amazed at what that little white line produced inside me. I was sober within seconds and I felt alive and perfect. I felt like I had a new outlook. I felt an energy that I had never experienced before and I could not believe I had never heard of it. How could these people that I have known for years, and partied with hundreds of times, kept this priceless wonder a secret from me all this time.
Well, none of that mattered really, because in my mind, I had finally found what i had been looking for...not even knowing that I had been searching for it to begin with. The first name I ever heard it called was "crank". Crank was definitely my kind of thing from that moment on. I knew it and I would do everything I could to experience it again. Little did I know that the first line of crank I snorted up my nose that night was the just the beginning.