This is my last blog for awhile, tomorrow morning I am entering inpatient rehab for 28 days. I have to be there at 0830 which is an hour and a half away, and I can't sleep. I'm scared what if I don't like who I really am? What's worse are those that I have to say good-bye to, and remove from my life. My friend Chris and especially his nephew, I love them so much, and they don't understand. They don't know I'm going to treatment, and I can't ever see them again. Especially since Chris was getting me stuff, and allowed his guy to get my info, leading to my bottom. I'm not really worried about self incrimination at this time, since the police know the whole story. I wish I could tell him, but he won't listen. Besides, he's an alcoholic and I can't be around that. I also know I will lose my bff wants the truth of it all comes out. She is the one I started using prescription drugs as RC. Still we trade off Ritalin and Adderall. Yeah she saved my life, but then she broke my heart when she choose her new husband she had just met 4 months prior. And who is the first on she calls after he walks out on her and the kids. She is unreliable, not sure how honest, must constantly have a man in her life, and they just flock to her, I can't get a date with a decent guy for nothing. Anyway, I guess this time it will be me choosing sobriety and stability over her. And the funny thing is, I really don't feel to bad about it. Because in all honesty she has again chosen a guy over me, there never seems to be a happy medium.
Actually the thought of having no cell phone and no internet for 28 days sounds great, NO DRAMA, and hate to say it but that girl is all about drama, and I'm all about wanting peace....
crap I have to get up in 3 hours... not even sure it's worth sleeping... peace to all, and see ya in 28 days!
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