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Schrödinger’s Meth Lab Found in Montana

  1. Rob Cypher
    Call it the meth lab that wasn't there: during a recent narcotics raid in Billings, Montana, a member of a police SWAT team dropped a flash grenade at the bedside of a sleeping 12-year-old girl, sending her to the hospital with second-degree burns and knocking out part of her bedroom wall.

    "We generally do not introduce these disorienting devices when [children are] present," Police Chief Rich St. John explained later. He went on to clarify that the officer (presumably Barney Fife) holding the grenade didn't realize there was a time delay when he tried to detonate it and that the entire department "did not want a juvenile...to get injured."

    After destroying the little girl's bedroom, officers realized that there was no meth lab inside, only terrified children. An investigation is currently being conducted.

    "If we're wrong or made a mistake, then we're going to take care of it," St. John said, "But if it determines we're not, then we'll go with that," just in case it turns out they did not, in fact, throw a flash grenade at a sleeping girl but instead perhaps a portable meth lab disguised as one.



  1. methylman251
    That last paragraph... its just the most perplexing thing who provides that sort of intellegence they get and how little happens if they completely get it wrong like they cearly did in that case. They'll have to mumble an apology and say they'll try harder next time then remind everyone how terrible drugs are and its totally acceptable to do that.
  2. kumar420
    absolutely retarded. so the idiot didn't even know how to use the concussive grenade properly and thats his defense? 'oh shit i didn't realise that it went boom after you pull the pin out'
    and after all that, it wasn't even the right residence?
    rationalization of incompetence, plain and simple. and they wonder why we don't like cops...
  3. fractalissue
    dea keeping childrens bedrooms safe from monsters somtimes using force
  4. fractalissue
    dont worry theres nothing under yolur bed except a dea loaded flash grenade that they arent sure how to detonate or keep from detonateing.
  5. BitterSweet
    All I can do is drop my jaw in amazement about how a DEA officer doesn't know how a flash grenade works and sends a little girl to the hospital. Like seriously, I use them in Call of Duty.

    A line from American Dad, "looks like I just picked myself a whole bouquet of oopsie-daisies" (after shooting a kid he thinks is the antichrist) lol.
  6. runnerupbeautyqueen
    I think they got lucky considering it WASN'T a meth lab and just a normal room. Have you seen those meth cooks who get 3rd degree burns all over their bodies just because they lit a cigarette in their lab or because a drop of sweat fell in the wrong place?

    So what the fuck kind of genius cop thinks, or even better says to the other cops, "oh there's a meth lab in there, filled with dangerous and explosive chemicals. We should totally throw A FUCKING FLASH GRENADE in it!"
  7. usually0
    runnerup, i think you hit the nail on the head. WTF were these guys thinking. They should train cops properly, this makes it sound like they're getting rookies to do these operations. That stuff's dangerous, you dont mess around
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