Well I haven't slept since yesterday, and I'm a little frustrated, I'd understand if I'd been doing meth, but I hadn't been, it's like when I take my meds once they kick in I have this window of time to go to sleep with no problems. But for a reason I have yet to figure out, I fight it. Once that window closes, so does my ability to fall asleep. Some nights I'll take another Klonipin, with no affect, so I'll try a Lortab, no help, maybe a couple ativan, if I'm lucky that will work. It's sad that I have such a high tolerance to medications. My dad was like that too. If 450mg of Seroquel isn't gonna knock you out, then what will.
At this point my mind feels like mush, and I hoping any posts or conversations I've had in the last few hours didn't come off like rambling gibberish, and if it did I apologize. I try so hard not to offend anyone, and to be helpful, resourceful, and educational. I probably even seem in some
cases I"m over reacting, cause every one else does it. But I'd feel bad if I blew someone off as just another addict, and something happened, like die or something. So I take ever post as an individual and not just another casual user of RC or just another addict. Cause we are all different, every case is different and we can't group everyone into categories.
Of course why should anyone listen to me, I may have experience with drugs, experience in pharmacology, cardiology, pulmonology, and emergency medicine, but when you look past that, I'm just another addict trying to for a shot at recovery. I have been over 24 hours since I last did any meth, and I have for the most part been taking my meds as prescribed today.... one day at a time, and I made it through today...
and with that... I think it was me rambling on and on, but it's my blog so it's ok lol.... yep, time to take my meds and get some much needed sleep.
Until till tomorrow
Oh and did I tell you I found the most awesome group to join : The Bitchin' Group, how awesome a social group where you can go and let it all out, other than my blog, and people relate, and it's the only group I belong to that people actually respond to you.... oh and I did find the group for the crazies... still thinking about the eating disorder group, since I have found many members that I can relate to.... but not to night... now it's really time for my rambling ass to put down the computer and go to sleep lol... (yep even delirious I still crack myself up)