Y am i writting to a blog? because all these crazy thoughts , there are so many I must let them out they get so noisy sometimes. And maybe cuz there is someone else inside screaming so loud to get out I just couldnt stand it anymore......
I have lived most of my 37 years somewhat ..umm just going thru the motions, on autopilot. I was married for 15 yrs to a man 14 yrs older than me, I was a faithful wife ,as far as other men/women were concerned :my affair was with a plasti baggie. This led to my current obession.. SEX. Up untill this point in my life, sex had always been just normal plain boring sex. I guess my new chemical of late- arroused parts that had been ignored - so now I fell like some kind of lil nymph that was held in chains and forced to listen to the unmistakeable sounds of complete and total pleasure of men and women, men and men, women and woman all of em just receiving endless hours of being taken just one foot over and brought back only to beg to go a lil further out each new time, I hope this is giving you the images similiar to what i see feel.... I want to know about bondage, sex without penatraion, only eye contact( can this really be achieved) I want to be made to beg for things that would make my friends gasp. I wanna feel myself feel.
Yes that is it! For now FEEL MYSELF FEEL-- can u FEEL URESELF FEEL ? or are you happy just being? I wanna be a he at least once I wanna be her once. Is this sort of thing normal Or iam too old to be behaving these fantasies? And where do I start ? I secretly see myself as a dominatrix (sp?) one day. anyone care to or dare to start like oprahs book club but not exactly more of a sexual awakening virtual expierence, you can never know to much right? Okay any offers on a teacher or would it be master?:crazy:crazy I think maybe i am off my rocker or maybe a sexual tension filled mid-life-nymphomanic state of heightened pleasure awareness. But iam a grown woman right! Right? thanx mom thanx dad for all your good girls shit not anymore
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