I was sitting here this morning overwhelmed by the changes in my life in mere months.
It is hard for me to even believe much less comprehend that just four months ago I was sitting the detox/mental health crisis unit in a hospital in Louisville CO after a breakdown in which I wanted to end everything and would have done anything including suicide just to stop the pain that being alive was causing me. Thankfully, I was unable to carry our my desire that day and was able to get help (granted at first against my will but I am so glad now that I did.)
Today, I have a confidence and contentment I never thought possible, especially after the life I had been leading. Multiple failed attempts at quitting meth, depression that was consuming my whole self and no hope in sight... I was still trying to get high, I say trying because I was still doing drugs but my amazing friend had unbeknownst to me prayed for the Lord to remove my ability to become intoxicated in hopes that the lack of effect would make my 'fix' stop 'fixing it' and IT WORKED!
When I finally, fed up and disgusted with my inability to stop using a drug that I no longer even enjoyed,said those 4 words I'd never been able to say out loud before, "GOD I need help." More so, when I cried out in desperation to God and said, "I NEED YOUR HELP, I can't do this on my own!" I opened the door for the Holy Spirit to move and my life since then has never ever been the same. I'm in love with life and with my Savior who loved me with and unending love and set me free!