And the idea of writing a blog post on that most positive and optimistic of attitudes that isn't only just for those who seem to have it naturally but can be grown and built into a person with a small effort at first that is massively worth the future positive rewards. The incentive of being in control of ones life and the experience of reality as we progress is worth updating the mindset by changing the odd belief and old limiting opinions and ideas of what we often think are fixed traits and just the way we are and will always be.
The truth is that the idea from Henry Ford that, "Whether you think you can or you think you can't, you're right." plays out very true as those who think they can't don't put in much effort or even try while those who constantly think they can no matter how many times they fail are far more likely to prove that they can indeed.
I can sometimes be accused of being one of those self help motivational gurus as I quote famous people's wise words but the thing is that I'm not making any money out of this and my intentions are only good and keeping with my natural drive to help others.
I went from non stop stimulant then downer then stimulant chaos to the point that I thought I was an addict. After sitting in on Narcotics Anonymous sessions and putting up with cult like prayers and a horribly painful and restricted idea of having to accept that only a higher power can cure me annoyed me enough to prove otherwise and this led to the thought that I will not accept that I'm an addict and I have control even though it may not be complete or how I would ideally like it, I'm working on making it that way. This is the spirit of Bandler and the never say die attitude of doing whatever it takes that I've picked up from his books, videos and audio. I can seem obsessed by the guy but he only really comes to mind as a person to give credit for ideas that I'm too honest to allow others to assume that they are mines.
I've been in anxiety panic station headquarters a number of times and if I didn't realize that it was simply an out of control imagination and self talk and that changing or stopping this and fully and deeply relaxing could instantly stop the suffering then I might have thought it was the way I was and just had to put up with it. Bandler has worked for 40 years with hundreds of thousands of people who not only got better but excelled and had enriching and happy lives. This is because he would not only fix their problem but also their attitude and their beliefs about what they can do such that they can solve their own problems as they come up later in life. People who just have some habit fixed or anxiety diffused may find that their way of doing things finds these negatives in other ways using their old thinking patterns. So as well as solving their problem they are also given a new perspective that has been divined from great minds he has modelled such as the medical Hypnotist Milton Erickson who, when faced with a problem he had never seen before and no idea of how to solve it, would think to himself excitedly, "Ahh! A rare and unprecedented opportunity to learn something new!" and he would use the massive and limitless creative potential of the human mind to find a solution.
I hated school but I have a belief from a one time moment where I got a basic sum correct and was told by an adult in such a way that I fully believed it that I was good at maths. This makes solving even complex equations inevitable no matter how daunting or seemingly elusive the solution seems. The belief itself keeps me going knowing that I'll find the answer and I always have. This is the power of belief because if you think about it most people can do simple sums but don't believe they are good at maths. I just accepted it and generalized it to all maths no matter how complex such that I give my mind that time and space to bring the solution or the next step into my awareness where those who say they can't block off that route and end up not getting it.
On the other hand I struggle with art and drawing. When I first started school there was a kid who was brilliant at drawing and since I didn't get close to his skill I believed to my detriment that I couldn't draw. This is often the way we put limits on our abilities which often remain all through our lives. Picasso said that all children are born artists, and using the model of the brain and how it is structured shows that we all have these possible gifted potentials in all areas of mind based skill but it's often those who stumble on a great strategy by chance that are labelled gifted while the rest of us think it's out of reach. The brain structure shows that each area can be grown through practice of certain skills such that all genius thinking can be learned. A book called Strategies of Genius gives exercises and ways of thinking in a set way that sharpens the areas of the mind required to reach the levels of such greats as Mozart, Tesla, Einstein and Di Vinci etc.
I haven't taken the time to prove in a factually subjective manner that these exercises work but I believe they do and that's often enough to ensure that any applied information over an extended period of time will bear fruit since the mind accepts that it will be that way which keeps problems to a minimum by finding solutions more quickly and easily. Doubts have their use such as doubting you'll ever have a bad trip on acid but when doubts arise that create uncertainty of reaching a goal then the very same doubts instruct the mind to find problems as a way of staying true to things not being easy and we end up struggling and often giving up with the words of impossibility, "I can't do it!" and that's it.
If you think of beliefs in a way such that having 100% certainty all the way on a set direction as forming the mind fully focused on solutions no matter what problems arise. Keeping this belief complete all the way along makes reaching where you want to go far more likely to occur and with the least amount of pain.
If you then think of doubts as splitting focus such that the mind uses up energy and resources that is no longer fully solution orientated but has a percentage of brain power looking for problems that might occur. The more you doubt the more the mind is looking for those blocks and limits and problems such that you find more of them which can get so restrictive that there isn't enough solution focused energy to move on. Doubts and a sense of not having what it takes creates a reality that aligns with these ideas such that you now have evidence to back up your beliefs in your ability or seemingly lack thereof. If all you can see is the wall you might miss the ladder to your side that is big enough to scale the obstruction so you can move on. Unless you change your thinking and move your head to see it then you may think that the wall is always going to be in your way and give up. In the realm of ideas most problems are imaginary and required imaginary solutions. One great way of overcoming such blocks is to imagine you've solved it and in full sensory detail notice what you are able to do and how things have changed for the better. Sometimes this can solve the problem without you even knowing how and also you can take the time to look back at the former problem and find in your amazing mind how you solved it.
Going back to how I solve maths problems I find that if the answer isn't there as quickly as I'd like I will take a deep breath, soften and relax my vision and let my unconscious mind be aware of the information of the problem and hold the belief that the answer is on its way. I found that this was also useful in writing when I hit a point where I knew the word I was looking for but it just seemed out of reach or on the tip of my tongue. Relaxing and accepting it's on its way works all the time and makes writing flow far more smoothly and enjoyably. I could have believed I can't do it and feel down about it but I know that's simply an attitude and not the one I'm willing to accept in the situation. I can then generalize the process of believing what I'm looking for is on its way in many other areas of the mind which increases the chance that'll I'll solve the problem and move forward.
Stress can be essential in some forms as in one way showing us there is a problem and things aren't working as planned. Often people will take this as a fault with themselves and end up stuck in a stressed out and non moving limited state. There is a lot of science showing that stress isn't as bad as is often made out and the finding of a study discovered that those who had lots of stress and thought it bad seemed to generally die younger and have more illness. The interesting finding is that even though those who claimed to have little stress lived longer and healthier lives, those who had lots of stress but seen it as a positive in their lives actually lived even longer and healthier lives than those with little stress. Using blood analysis it was found that those who believe in stress as good flooded their neurology and biology with body chemicals such as endorphins, dopamine and other positives that counter acted any damage from stress hormones and not only healed those body parts but made them healthier overall.
This has led me to the idea of using my system of relaxation to diffuse stress from problems and using the stress feeling as a signal that my body is ready for the challenge such that I will get excited in anticipation of finding that solution that I believe I have in me.
This doesn't mean that I now have to be that way all the time. Think of it rather as adding to my options giving me more chance of succeeding and solving problems since I can shift from one way to another depending on the situation if the first way makes things worse.
So that is where I put my first step in building the most resilient and effective of attitudes by giving myself a strong sense of self belief that I can and will reach where it is I've directed myself and keep it strong no matter how painful or problematic things may seem. Of course it is wise to remember the definition of insanity given by Einstein that is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. Believing that the mind is infinite in creative solutions and being flexible enough to change when what is applied isn't working such that eventually it's only a matter of time before the solution is found.
If you desire to find what this kind of attitude and way of being in the world can create I find the book Persuasion Engineering by Bandler and La Valle to be inspiring such are the many solutions to real world problems in story form that are many in number from start to finish. Just because people are more unwilling to part with their cash doesn't mean you have to believe that you can't sell anything. It simply means you have to change and adapt, evolve and grow such that the creative nature of the brain will find a way as long as you believe.
Who do you want to be?
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