Why can't I be perfect and be able to save everyone from them selves?

By Potter · May 22, 2009 · ·
  1. Potter
    It would make things so much easier.

    God this get's tiring after a while. It hurts to see people doing dumb things over and over and over and over. We try as hard as we can to provide good information and do people listen? Here, a lot of them do, but still, there's so many that don't and that starts to weigh you down. Try as we might we just can't save everyone from themselves and that fucking sucks.

    Today, I spent a lot of my time reporting self incrimination, horribly dangerous advice, general rule breaking, and I kept coming across people who've been here for years that don't seem like they've learned a thing. It's even worse elsewhere. I keep tabs on a community on LiveJournal and I know half the members are kids and it shows. Every day the same BS posts, "Can I get high off of my prozac?" "I took to vicoden am I going to die?" "I heard OJ makes acid even stronger?" "I've run out of veins can I shoot up in an artery?" "What was in this pill I took?" "I got all messed up on mushrooms should I do LSD?" "Driving on drugs is KOOL!"

    Found a horribly depressing post today on what to do when you come home and there's someone dead of a smack OD. I can't help but wonder if the person wrote that as their friend was lying there dead. I think that's even worse then the ones where people are clearly having medical emergencies and their first reaction it to go online and sit around and wait and see what random strangers tell them to do.

    -sigh- I'm tired, I think I should take a few days off.

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  1. old hippie 56
    Got a feeling that we all feel this way every once in a while. Seems like a uphill battle sometimes, but we must continue. If not, who is there to take our place?
  2. Ilsa
    go find some beauty and silence for awhile....it is immensely depressing to see people in general, and especially those we care about, making the same mistakes or new and more dangerous ones.

    you do so much to help, Potter, but we must all remember that we control only our own actions.

    once the options for helping someone have been exhausted, all we can really do is either be there to listen if we are emotionally able, or put some distance between ourselves and the individual/issue at hand until mental and emotional balance has been restored and we can be of help without enabling or self-sacrificing.

    perhaps, as you mentioned, a break of some sort is in order, and doing what YOU want with the time to relax and take care of YOU and no one else for a few days. maybe incorporating some "you time" into your daily routine could help you maintain some balance. for those of us drawn to care-taking, compassion is a large part of our outlook, and it is easy to over-commit in terms of time, energy, emotion, etc when trying to help others.

    you do a great job, Potter and imho you deserve some time for no one else but YOU. take a short trip out of town, relax at home and go to the park, get out and do whatever you feel like doing!

    take care of you first, so that you can better take care of others later.
  3. anonuser30500
    Everyone needs to take a break - even a Saint would need time out here on planet, er, Earth (that's the one!)

    It is a strange world in some ways, that people can appeal to people online to help out. But before the internet, I guess people were more isolated or backed off into a corner and had LESS help. A heroin addict in the 70s for instance, holding down a job and staying away from the dark side, would need to be clever to learn correct usage and determine a damage limitation program.

    Knowing others are in the same boat as swim and swiy is a big help by itself. Even if your overboard, hearing others around you is going to encourage you to stay afloat.

    For those who use their time online to help advise others with respect to harm reduction and common sense, you do a great job.

    Sometimes a 'stranger' makes a better companion than those close to you. Like confession in some ways - baring your soul to someone who does not judge, but might point to the error of swiy ways sometimes.

    Keep it up.
  4. Joe-(5-HTP)
    I have always had a suspicion that human ignorance is not curable by simply pointing out the truth. Still, if you help only 1% of the pepople you set out to help, then it will have been worth it eh? And I'm sure you do much more.

  5. wespawloski
    One cannot forcibly save people from themselves; one can only try to bring that necessity to another's perception.

    Its sad but true... yet, the knowledge obtained and transferred by those unable to prevent themselves from engaging danger... is interesting.
  6. Coconut
    You can't help everyone. Drugs-Forum exists to assist those who come to us, but it would be impossible to venture out to the Internet and actively spread the good information we have here.

    The majority of people are floating in misinformation about drugs and a lot of them will make severe mistakes.
  7. Potter
    Thanks for the kind words everyone. This really isn't an entirely true reflection on my own feelings (I don't care THAT much) but more of a vent that I felt was relatively important to get down in writing.
  8. DopinDan
    SWIM is an old dude now, but he remembers his younger days when he was using a lot more, and more variety. SWIM is practically clean compared to those days. But, SWIM used to try do some library reasearch to get an idea of what he was taking, beforehand.

    Still, it is not without risks, and many of SWIM's acquaintances were reckless, and some of them are gone now. There were a few times SWIM thought he was a goner, and promised to never use again...and he would be more careful for a while.

    Harm reduction is still not widely accepted by the major non elected "authorities" such as the INCB/DEA and their ilk, and thus is not mainstream, yet.

    Most are told to simply "just say no", but don't understand why they should "just say no".

    Kids today have a great resource in the Internet, the hardest part is finding, and understanding the real information, and differentiating it from the mis-information.
  9. Euthanatos93420
    People are responsible for their own actions. Whether they realise it or not. You're doing good stuff for other people and you should feel good about it.

    The beauty of life is in the limitations. Without lines being drawn nothing would be definative anywhere. If I were you I'd stop worrying about other peoples problems and feel good knowing I'd done some benefit.

    Like in meditation and ritual work, it's not about what you're doing but where you direct your focus and attention.

    Besides, isn't it the prohibitionist argument that we should coddle people and protect them from themselves?

    Darwin was a lawyer, not a scientist or a historian.

    It's sad but at some point we should just let people do stupid shit even if it kills them.

    I know MY kid will be taught to be educated and responsible.
  10. wespawloski
    Well said. Education is a most important gift.
  11. dyingtomorrow
    I think humans have a natural urge to want to get high. How many tens of thousands of years have we been doing so?

    The dumb questions are a result of this ridiculous system where we keep young people, and adults as well, completely in the dark about this fundamental aspect of human life. It's the same way abstinence programs in school as opposed to condom and safety oriented programs just end up with a bunch of pregnant teens and infected kids. Except in the case of drugs it's a lot more dangerous.

    Personally I'm glad that they are asking, rather than trying to figure it out themselves. SWIM has had to go through a lot of pain on his own learning the ins and outs of IV heroin use, and is more than happy to spare everyone else he can on this planet the same pain.

    Maybe considering it from the angle that educating the person in each "dumb" question is helping a real human being sitting somewhere in the world would make it seem less stressful?
  12. davestate
    Illegitimi non carborundum:

    Pig latin for "don't let the bastards gring you down"
    Seems appropriate
  13. Venusia
    Hey, I know this is a little dated, but I am sure the content is still relevant for you. I just wanted to say thanks for having everyone's best interests in mind and caring so much about us newbs and DF in general. You pop up everywhere correcting misinformed people, teaching babies to SWIM, and answering questions whenever you can. I haven't been here terribly long, but I have noticed that you are definitely an asset to the DF community. Hugs.
  14. cyndi
    Sometimes you have to take time out from the boards just to put things in perspective especially if something upsets you a great deal. Boards should be for sharing not make things more disturbing. That sounds like a horrible story but unfortunately some people are like that. Take time and come back with a clear head.
  15. LostControl
    I worked at a pharmacy for years, and constantly amazed at the terrible things people would do to their bodies. I realize I worked in a poorer section of town, where a lot of people were immigrants / on welfare - but damn, I saw some of the worst stuff you can imagine (frostbitten toes falling off, pieces of wire in an eye; finger amputation; etc..). I understood with people like this - they came from countries that don't have free medical care, and went wherever they thought they could get free medical help. Then there were the people who did damage to themselves and knew better - the guys who drank 1 liter bottles of cough syrup with codeine, then passed out in the parking lot, the people who wouldn't buy their kids antibiotics, but bought cigarettes, people who bitched about the cost of insulin, but I saw them 10 minutes later in the food court eating ice cream, people selling their Tylenol 3s and Valium every month....
    There's only so much help we can give people, then they are on their own. I get really frustrated here on DF when people give incorrect advice (like Oxycontin contains acetaminophen!). With the whole world of information available on the Internet, it doesn't take a ton of time to research the correct answer.
    I guess this hasn't helped to make you feel any better, but at least you know you're not alone!
    P.s. - I went back to school, got my Masters degree, and now work in research in a hospital. No longer dealing with insane customers at the pharmacy. No longer worried I'll be killed by a patient (as my boss was).
  16. Mick Mouse
    Potter, all one can say is - Hold the line. In the military, we were taught many things, but the most important ones were never to give in to the doubt and fear that what you are doing might be useless. Hold the line! What you are doing is valuable and worthwhile, and if we can save just one person, just one parents child, then it is all worthwhile.

    Remember, you do not stand alone!
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