Why is it, we as human beings are sometimes unable to cut that connecting cord that binds us to another person? So, when you think of them it pulls at you in a way that says, hey, they still exist, and you still can't breathe sometimes when you fathom your life without them when you thought for so long...when you thought for so long, that they were going to be forever.
So, we go on about our lives, living as normally as possible, until its mostly not an act, nevermind the 1/4 of dope you smoked to stay at a blue and sunshiney 78 degrees, and nevermind that a memory or some sensory imput will hit you from moment to moment, slamming you in the chest until you think you may stumble. Never knowing when you will suddenly feel the need to throw something, or scream or SOMETHING to get that feeling inside of you out. OUT.
Yet, as much as we hate this, as much as we HATE missing them, and feeling that twist you only get for someone you loved so much, we hold on to it, we can not let go.
Everyday I convince myself to let go, and everyday I look down, and there I am, holding on, feeling him tug from the other side.