Thank you for the responses, and also to the people who have PM'd me with advice for my fictional character. I did not find anyone's words to be harsh, I am grateful for the advice and the concern expresssed for my fictional character.
FC did manage to get her hand on 1 x used patches. While she had a very nice time, or rather it helped her get through a difficult week, she rather regrets it, and it's not on her list of things to do again in a hurry.
FC was aware of the difficulty in determining how much active ingredient was remaining in the patch, and for this reason she cut up the pieces very very ridiculously small. And then placed one under her tongue. She would wait 45 mins, and then place another, until she felt a nice warm feeling all over. She had a used 12 mcg patch of the Denpax kind. As this was the one sitting tantilisingly at the top of the bin. She cut that teeny patch up into 12 pieces. She used 4 pieces per day, over three non consecutive days. ((As a side note, the fictional facility where FC works has switched to Denpax recently from Durogesic
for the very reason that there is less overall Fentanyl
in the patch-- according to the manufacturers--- and therefore less waste and less potential for abuse. So perhaps another brand would be more potent and dangerous, and of course anyone out there should be careful with anything they are doing)).
FC would by no means recommend this to anyone. Perhaps it is blind luck that FC isn't dead. She did notice that some pieces of the patch seemed to have greater effect than others, and this highlighted to FC the difficulties of accurately dosing pieces of these patches. She is also aware that she tended to swallow now and then and probably much of the ingredients got wasted that way.
While FC has a nice warm fuzzy feeling for days, and even found herself motivated to do things like clean the house, which sadly has not been done in weeks, she is left with a lingering feeling of guilt over what she has done. And the advice of people was ringing in her ears the entire time. FC feels this is perhaps an all time low thing for her to have done. And by no means will she make a habit of it. Fishing through a bin to find a used patch that's been on someone's body for three days seems a little but pathetic and desperate. And it's not a path that FC wants to go down. The tolerance issue is also quite a motivator. FC can see how easy it would be to get sucked into a downward spiral, and want more and more, particularly with the ease of access. FC does not want that. It rather frightens her that she did this once. She sees this as a one off recreational experiement, that will not be repeated.
But as for the experience itself, and FC would by no means recommend to anyone trying this, but for FC is was a very warm pleasant feeling, which seemed to linger on for days. She couldn't call is a euphoric high, but she would say it was a peaceful warm fuzzy feeling. And it was a nice respite from the turmoil in her mind. It helped her get through a very bad week.
However, all in all, she feels bad about sinking to this new level. And the whole experience has been a wake up call for her in the cold light of day. FC is going to be heading back to Codeine
CWE for the mean time, and maybe trying to find some other ways to cope with her anxiety/depression rather than self medicating.
Thank you to everyone for the advice, and it is with a heavy heart that I inform you of FC's experiement with Fentanyl, because she is not proud of it, and realises that it was stupid. She really feels quite terrible, and this is uncharacteristic of her. She usually enjoys whatever she is able to get her hands on. But she is aware of the dangers and stupidity of what she has done, and the potential to get sucked into a downward spiral. She will be staying welll clear of Fentanyl in future chapters.
Thankyou for the input and listening.