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Alcohol addiction Support for coping with Alcohol addiction and Alcohol addiction treatment.

 
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  #1  
Old 20-11-2013, 09:08
msgrayson msgrayson is offline
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Need help! Please! SO scared!

I posted this..but must not have saved as I can not find!
I really need some insight! I was an opiate addict who finally quit cold turkey in Aug. Very proud of that, as it was so hard! But, I am ashamed to admit I traded it for an addiction to alcohol!

I have realized it is a huge problem and have tried to stop. I went down a little and stopped CT.

Last night was the first night. I started seeing things! I saw people in my hallway, some motioning me to come to them... Heard voices randomly talking. I saw my ceiling cracking open...it was like i thought I saw this...it was so real!

I heard full conversations, like they were coming from the backyard and that is not possible where I live...but it seemed so real! I made a bowl of cereal and the whole time I was eating ti I could hear it "boiling!" I went out to the car after dark to grab something from my car and saw a small fox! Then coming to the house I looked to the right and saw what I would describe as the Grimm reaper!

I promise you all I have no mental issues and never diagnosed or and this problem before! I am so completely scared and wonder if I quit too quickly. After opiates I was drinking about a fifth a day. Never getting drunk, just needing (eventually) to spread ti slowly throughout the day.Some one please tell me it i will be ok...or at least your experiences! I apologize if this is a double posts! A bit freaked out at the moment!

Last edited by Smeg; 20-11-2013 at 14:14. Reason: Paragraphs and line-spacing for ease of reading.
  #2  
Old 20-11-2013, 09:24
pinksox pinksox is nu online
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Re: Need help! Please! SO scared!

Last night as in "over 24 hours ago?" Or last night as in a few hours ago?

Anyway, you're right to be concerned. Those are some pretty alarming symptoms. Cereal has thiamine in it, so that was probably helpful. I think you already know the right answer is a medically-supervised detox. Opiate withdrawal is miserable... but generally it won't kill anyone by itself. As I'm sure you're aware, the same doesn't hold true for alcohol withdrawal if it progresses to DT's.

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Good point about a medically supervised detox.
Excellent that you mentioned the severity of alcohol detox as apposed to opiate detox. Very important point.

Last edited by pinksox; 20-11-2013 at 09:34.
  #3  
Old 20-11-2013, 09:44
msgrayson msgrayson is offline
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Re: Need help! Please! SO scared!

my last drink was sunday early evening, so i was not expecting anything this soon...or so serious! It leaves me wondering if i am in WD or simply going insane...ALL comments are very welcome and truly appreciated...

msgrayson added 9 Minutes and 41 Seconds later...

Wow. I reread what I wrote and I sound like a real nutcase! It is insane how real everything I have experienced seemed! My writing may not show it at the moment, but I consider myself very level headed, educated and have never experienced anything paranormal! I am completely freaked out at what I have put my brain/body through! Getting off opiates was the single hardest experience of my life! I can not even explain that enough...but alcohol...it is scary! You go a few hours and your heart is racing 125 plus per min! And then to be seeing things now! I am so terrible scared! I ran to this forum first because no one but readers her know I have a problem! Sorry again for the rambling...I am going 2 days now no sleep!

msgrayson added 6 Minutes and 13 Seconds later...

I am just learning the dangers of alcohol withdrawal. I did go to my dr last week and he was not very supportive at all . No benzos, just taper myself...I hope I can do it! I don't think detox is an option. Left my job of 10 years and no insurance! And have not come clean to my family after the opiates. I know I can do this! I am strong, but just REALLY did not expect hallucinations! They were just so real! What a lesson I have learned though! Thank you for taking the time time to respond...I am here at home while everyone is sleeping and very scared! I have decided to take my taper a little slower...I will do it! But I must be safe!

Last edited by msgrayson; 20-11-2013 at 09:44. Reason: Automerged Doublepost
  #4  
Old 20-11-2013, 09:55
pinksox pinksox is nu online
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Re: Need help! Please! SO scared!

Quote:
Originally Posted by msgrayson View Post
I am just learning the dangers of alcohol withdrawal. I did go to my dr last week and he was not very supportive at all . No benzos, just taper myself...I hope I can do it! I don't think detox is an option. Left my job of 10 years and no insurance! And have not come clean to my family after the opiates. I know I can do this! I am strong, but just REALLY did not expect hallucinations! They were just so real! What a lesson I have learned though! Thank you for taking the time time to respond...I am here at home while everyone is sleeping and very scared! I have decided to take my taper a little slower...I will do it! But I must be safe!
It's always disappointing when ones doctor isn't supportive. I still say, you should get medical help now, but at the very least you should give your doc a call in the am and let them know about this. Hallucinations-- especially when both auditory and visual are present-- is significant. You should also be supplementing Thiamine (b1) and probably folic acid as well. IMO, it borders on malpractice for a medical doctor to not make sure this base is covered in any patient coming off significant alcohol use after a period of abuse.

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Good point about the doctor's negligence.

Last edited by pinksox; 20-11-2013 at 10:01. Reason: Automerged Doublepost
  #5  
Old 20-11-2013, 10:02
msgrayson msgrayson is offline
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Re: Need help! Please! SO scared!

I also wonder from those who may know..is a fifth of vodka a day a lot! Sad that I have to ask that! I was never a big drinker! But as I got use to alcohol, a fifth seemed to last a whole day! I guess I have answered my own question...it is a lot if you have to wake up drink or get up in the night to avoid WD! I never get drunk, just drink slowly all day! God, How did this happen to me?? I wonder what others drink compared to me! I would like to know where I fall on the scale...
  #6  
Old 20-11-2013, 10:19
pinksox pinksox is nu online
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Re: Need help! Please! SO scared!

Well, medically speaking anyway, we consider the upper limit for "moderate" use in females to be 3 per day/7 per week. Anything above that amount has the potential to cause issues. A fifth typically contains 17 standard drinks...

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Good advice throughout for the OP.
  #7  
Old 20-11-2013, 10:24
msgrayson msgrayson is offline
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Re: Need help! Please! SO scared!

Again thank you very much for taking the time to respond! I appreciate everything you have to say! I know I can do this, but now know I must do it very carefully! I wish I could afford a good detox center, but with recent events in our life, it is not an option! Opiates were so hard to quit...but alcohol is truly scary!

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For all of your very brave and honest podts in this thread, through what must be an extremely difficult and frightening time for you.
  #8  
Old 20-11-2013, 11:28
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Re: Need help! Please! SO scared!

Pinksox put it very clearly, Msgrayson, you need medical support if not supervisions.
Hallucinations are a symptim of severe alc withdrawal and doing an alcohol withdrawal on their own and on top cold turkey already did cost many lives.

You are showing awesome strength with trying to wd alc so short after wd-ing opiates, your way is a good one, you just need to be careful how you set your steps.

Sending you good wishes

BBW
  #9  
Old 20-11-2013, 18:16
St Dismas Novitiate St Dismas Novitiate is offline
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Re: Need help! Please! SO scared!

Alcohol is one of the only drugs which can actually kill you during the withdrawal process. Other drugs, such as opiates, will make you wish you were dead, but they will not actually kill you themselves. This is why EVERYONE recommends a medically-supervised alcohol withdrawal process. If your doc will not cooperate, get another doctor! You might also look into community mental health agencies, as they are separate from the medical doctor side of things, and you can get services from them often without disclosing current medical.....status? Is that the word I'm looking for? The fact that you have an un-supportive primary care doc?

Also, as was mentioned here, hallucinations-audio, visual, and tactile-are a common and ever-increasing part of alcohol withdrawal. And once the physical part is over, then the fun really begins. Intensive, long-term counseling is one of the only truly effective methods of staying off alcohol.

This will be almost impossible to do in secret, and eventually, someone you are close to will discover what you are trying so desperately to keep hidden. It would be best to bring them into the loop now, accept the fall-out, and then move forward together. this gives you one of the other most important things you will need to succeed-a support system of people who care about you and who have your back when you start to fall.
  #10  
Old 23-11-2013, 12:33
pinksox pinksox is nu online
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Re: Need help! Please! SO scared!

Sooo... it's been a few days. How are you feeling?
  #11  
Old 24-11-2013, 19:45
thunderkat59 thunderkat59 is offline
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Re: Need help! Please! SO scared!

I OD'd on alcohol twice. I had all the symptoms you describe and more. Dont wait to call this to someone's attention! Reach out ! I couldn't breath, my heart would beat CRAZILY just walking across the room. I had these weird mini-seizure type events that were debilitating. The last one, my body 'died'. At the hospital, I had to have a librium drip for about a day before they would even move me to a facility. But, enough of my boring story . . . You need to NOT worry what other people think and get help. Alcohol is insidious and it only gets worse and worse. Having no insurance might actually be to your benefit in this situation, because I think you qualify for more local social service agency help, without it. Even a week of supervised dry-out will be a huge help. At 72 hours, you will at least be able to focus and think rationally about what to do next. Have someone help you call all local service based organizations that deal in substance abuse.
Please get help and best wishes to your getting some relief from this demon.

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Good info for the OP
  #12  
Old 02-12-2013, 15:15
Jake. Jake. is offline
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Re: Need help! Please! SO scared!

I find it shocking that given the symptoms you have experienced , what sounds like the start of delirium tremens, they are not offering a medicaly supervised detox.

If you are still drinking here are some tips to taper

Measure out your ounces of alcohol and take into account the percentage of alcohol by volume. You would measure out pre made drink for the day into say 7 separate containers for the week, reducing by no more than 10 percent each time. hide the rest of the alcohol away so you are not tempted to drink that aswell

If you are drinking spirits or wine then gradually try and reduce to beer/cider with less strength, to help you taper down.

You want to drink enough so that you don't get drunk but that you abate the awful withdrawal symptoms

Look into kudzu aswell. it is a herbal supplement you can take which makes the effects of alcohol more intense so you need less of it to feel the same. it should help you reduce

I hope this info has helped

I used to drink 1 bottle of spirits/3 bottles of wine a day until 26th June 2012 which was my day of freedom. If you have any questions feel free to ask and I wish you all the luck in the world

Jake

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Supportive post with useful info for the OP. Wlecome to DF!
  #13  
Old 02-12-2013, 18:24
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Re: Need help! Please! SO scared!

I second Jake. Bu the sounds of it, severe DT symptoms will be the result of a cold detox. Alcohok detox should never be done cold or without medical supervision.

If you really have to try and quit without medical help, the alcohol amount per day will need to be tapered. Have you tried AA for support?
  #14  
Old 09-12-2013, 10:46
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Re: Need help! Please! SO scared!

How is the OP doing? This thread fascinated me and I hope she's doing okay, and is only gone because she had sought help...
  #15  
Old 11-12-2013, 22:46
Jake. Jake. is offline
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Re: Need help! Please! SO scared!

Do please give us an update OP

Thinking of you

Jake

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This ade me feel like someone actually cared~
  #16  
Old 01-02-2014, 04:40
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Re: Need help! Please! SO scared!

holy schnikeys!!! a fifth of vodka a day!!! that alone would kill me lol....i feel very sorry for you..why did noone in your life try to stop you!?that is serious...my husband is an alcoholic.or was maybe.i dont know if he still is as he hasnt drank in almost a month.he was EXTREMELY crabby for 2 wks.barely slept at all.he was put on librium tho...shame on the doctor for not trying to help you overcome.i'd definatly get a new doctor.some of them hate their jobs it seems.....he was suggested to use caffeine to help him adjust to???guess it helped.he keeps a 2 liter by him all night instead of a bottle of liqour now..worth a shot.hang in there you can beat this

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This is incoherent and has little to do with the topic.
  #17  
Old 01-02-2014, 10:09
sam_ham90 sam_ham90 is offline
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Re: Need help! Please! SO scared!

good luck dude! hope you have or are seeking medical attention. at the very least seek out a nursing hotline if you have one in you're area. they can give you some more advice!
  #18  
Old 04-02-2014, 05:39
Kabukicho Kabukicho is offline
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Re: Need help! Please! SO scared!

OP? Come back.

Your alcohol consumption was off the charts and your withdrawal symptoms sound positively terrifying. I would have gone to the ER and gotten a benzo. Alcohol withdrawal at that level is NOT something to be messed around with.
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Old 04-02-2014, 18:29
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Re: Need help! Please! SO scared!

This looks not good.. I hope everything is ok
  #20  
Old 10-02-2014, 18:39
msgrayson msgrayson is offline
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Re: Need help! Please! SO scared!

I am literally in tears reading your responses! This has been a rough battle! I followed advice and tapered (SO HARD!!) Why do I feel I need to be intoxicated at all times???? I wish the door to drugs were never opened to me!
  #21  
Old 11-02-2014, 00:13
PianoHarry PianoHarry is offline
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Re: Need help! Please! SO scared!

I wondered why I needed to be out of it all the time too. In some of my past posts I have written all about this, but ultimately I needed to change. This is where the 12 steps of AA really helped. It can help you too, I am sure.

Cheers, Harry https://drugs-forum.com/forum/sho...d.php?t=231072
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Old 12-02-2014, 01:05
PianoHarry PianoHarry is offline
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Re: Need help! Please! SO scared!

Sorry about the short post yesterday, and dumping a link on you and expecting you to look it up: I was very pressed for time and I had the impression that your post really needed an immediate response. So the best I could do was refer you to an old post of mine. I didn't mean to be presumptuous. I have a bit more time now.

I am under no illusions about drug addiction, alcoholism. (They are the same thing. Alcohol is a drug).
The disease has such a power to kill. Kill and con at the same time: Recently a neighbour came to me and asked if I would take him to an AA meeting. I had approached him a couple of times so he knew I was a member of AA. He was in a very bad state.

I live in a country regional center. We don't have meetings every day. The nearest one was 3 days away and I offered to take him and in the meantime, to chat with him and perhaps help him with this introduction to sobriety. The day of the meeting he called to say he wouldn't be attending. His drinking, he felt, wasn't that bad. I didn't press him, just told him how most alcoholics feel this way. It's called denial and it gives us permission to go back to the bottle.

There is a passage in the AA book that I really identify with. This is not verbatim but from memory:

There is a complete failure of the kind of mechanism that prevents one from putting their hand on a hot stove. or

We are unable, at certain times, to bring into our consciousness with sufficient force the memory of the suffering and humiliation of even a week or a month ago.

A week after the proposed meeting my neighbour dropped dead whilst carrying his empty bottles to the bin. His heart had been so weakened by alcohol. Prior to this I have seen several AA members and NA members slip and consequently die.

I am one of the lucky ones. So far I've been clean and sober for 16 years. One day at a time.

Here is a bit of what it was like for me.

First up. When I got sober (I'll use the same word,'sober' in relation to booze and dope) the people at AA and NA said that if I wanted that need to drink to disappear then I would have to change. I objected strongly to this. I was convinced that I had a problem with booze and dope but that was all. There was nothing wrong with me.

This is where modern medicine fails. Doctors think that if they sober a person up that should be the end of it. But getting sober is the beginning. Staying sober is the real business. Those people at the 12 Step fellowships . . . they are for the most part, sober. Their reason for being there is that they know they need to stay that way or die.

Gradually, as I stuck it out in AA I learned that I really did need to change.

I was a shy kid. I used to behave loudly to attract attention but inside I was terrified. Nothing changed as I matured.
I thought everyone else was better than myself. If you liked me, then I was okay. If you didn't like me, it meant I was worthless. I so much wanted people to like me. When women told me they loved me I didn't believe them. How could they?
So I put on an act, a face for the world.

I lived with a cloud over my head. A cloud of fear that you might see the real me. And if you did see the real me, you wouldn't like me.

I chose my occupation - a musician - not for a great noble love of music, of course, I did love music, but because I thought people would like me if I could play. But I never felt good enough in my work, either.

I was terrified of the opposite sex. Asking a woman to dance was a trauma. I spent my school dances sitting alone, too frightened of rejection to ask a girl to dance. I was a normal teenage boy and I wanted a girlfriend but I was too frightened of rejection to ask.

If I was rejected that meant I was absolutely zero.

I could write a page on how I felt guilty for things I hadn't even done. A friend of mine steals a car. I wasn't even there. But I felt guilty when my father asked me about it.

Of course, at the time I wasn't so analytical. I only knew I wasn't as good as the other kids.

This continued into my adulthood but by now I had discovered alcohol.

ZING!! The booze allowed me to be everything I wasn't. I felt alive when I drank. I was cool, confident and good looking.

Booze (include dope) opened doors in my personality. It took away the great fear that I lived with. But there was a price more than money.

I couldn't stop once I started. So many times I said I am only going to drink a 6 pack but, car keys in hand I would go to buy more. I rarely got away with limiting my consumption. I would put taxi fare in a separate pocket so I wouldn't spend it. Yet I wound up walking home at 3 am because I drank my cab fare.

I promised everyone I would stop. Sincerely. I really meant it. But I couldn't.

Now, when I got sober I still had all those fears, low self esteem to deal with. This is where I needed to change if I was to stay sober.

So I took the 12 Steps and I did change. I'm still changing today. Today I live completely differently to the way I did 16 years ago. Today I can live without inappropriate fear. I have peace in my life today. Rest from the gnawing nagging need to get out of it. I have a fairly quiet life. I go to meetings, help when I can, and don't use booze or any other chemicals to make things bearable. It's a good life.

My cat is sat on my lap as he always is when I write. The sun is shining, it's a warm day. Inside, in my heart it is still, quiet. Life is okay. I still have problems but I can deal with them without using. For me that is the miracle.

I hope this long post has been of use to you. Writing it has been very valuable for me.

Cheers,

Harry

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what a fabulously inspiring life. thankyou for such openness.
  #23  
Old 23-02-2014, 04:25
Shigeru Shigeru is offline
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Re: Need help! Please! SO scared!

I'm sorry you had to go through that. I've seen people in full-blown Delirium Tremens while I was a patient in the hospital and it was no joke. You already know what it's about so my describing what I saw second hand serves no purpose.

Sadly, where you gave up an addiction for opiates and picked up alcohol, I put down alcohol and my opiate addiction filled that space. It took me 40 years to get my act together but I've been doing well the past 4 years and things are finally going my way.

Hopefully, you're smarter than I was, and you won't have to hit bottom to see your way up.

Best of luck.

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