Day 6 at 2mg was the best day ive had in a long while. I guess im just gonna have sleep issues now, because last night sleep was shit. I bought a blood pressure machine today to make sure i have it. Clonidine is in my future so i want to keep a check. Maybe it will help me sleep tonight. It was a wierd day as far as symptoms go... after not sleeping well i got up early to go grocery shopping. My body could have been made of lead as far as energy was concerned. That trip took a few hours, it was brutal.
After that i ate breakfast and took my vitamins. At some point shortly after that i had normal energy. I even fixed some broken shit around the house i had been putting off. I had to take breaks because energy was not a constant thing. I've read it in other peoples journal... it came in waves. No pains or major rls symptoms. I wasnt cold like the previous days. i cant believe my body could adjust to such a low dose. If my normal taper reaction occurs i would be 100% in another week...too bad ill never find out. Tomorrow is my last day on this shit. Ill admit that i was exhausted more than i had energy today, but i like to focus on the positive.
Even on my worst days i focus on whats good about that day not what sucks. The brain fog that i've forgot to tell you about, because of the brain fog, is still going strong. Its hard to describe how strange it feels to reach back in your mind for a thought, but get no reply. Plus it kind off feels like im in a dream, i like it. Ive still got sweaty pitts and increased libido. I always have just enough energy to fool around...wink...wink.
As far as things that have aided my symptoms so far. A hot shower before bed helps with the rls and leg pain, when i have those problems. I swear the vitamins i have already been taking for MS help. I take ALA two time per day, DHA one time per day, B complex once daily, B12 sublingal 3 times per day, combined calcium magnesium zinc two time per day, D3 once, Lots of vitamin C. I double up on the magnesium pills at bedtime, if my legs are going crazy. Maybe itll help yall too.
Cbabycee, thanks for showing this journal some love. My drug of choice was drugs. I liked to party on the weekends with whatever was around. Ive done all manner of hard drugs, I used to inject cocaine, smoke crack, meth smoked and injected, heroin...when it was around. I just liked experimenting. It was all casual until my dad died in 2006. Thats when pain meds really came in hard. Still wasnt addicted...could stop without withdrawals. I started having peripheral neuropathy when my MS started up. So I found myself in pain management with a fentanyl prescription.
I didnt wear a single patch, always had an entire months script smoked in a 3 day binge without sleeping. It was bliss until they ran out. I starting taking my buddy's methadone to escape the hellish withdrawals. Then i lost my medical insurance, could not afford dr. visits and shit. Methadone actually worked for my pain better than the fentanyl, since i didnt abuse it. My neuropathy was gone after two years at the clinic. I was left with a physical addiction. Once i was diagnosed with MS i stopped partying. I never failed a drug test, and had all my take homes. Im a different person than i used to be. Im a family man now. Got 2 kids age 2 girl and 6 months boy. I stay at home and take care of them the best i can. Once i realized that the nerve pain was gone, and i was growing female breasts... time to take stock. Ive been tapering since then. So to answer your question with getting long winded! Fentanyl...was.
Bedtime...i hope i can sleep. Either way, tomorrows my last day on methadone
woodrod added 2 Minutes and 33 Seconds later...
I typed all those words into pretty paragraph. i dont know why it looks shitty now. i even typed it on my PC because i thought my phone screwed up the format. oh well, maybe yall can still read it easily.
woodrod added 1394 Minutes and 59 Seconds later...
Day 7 at 2mg was rather uneventful as far as symptoms go. Still got the brain fog going on, and sweaty pits. 2 sneezes. Id say my energy level was the low side of normal, but i was busy most of the day at the veterans hospital seeing my neurologist. It didnt stop me from doing what i needed to do. No waves of energy today. I slept great last night, with just melatonin. Still woke up alot but that tends to happen when a 2 years old kicks me in the balls all night. Thanks for the kind words Cmenot. Its about time for my last dose before bed...the last dose ever. Im a little nervous and a little excited. Maybe ill light some candles and do a ceremony. Now starts the hard part...as if the shit leading to this was piece of cake.
woodrod added 1340 Minutes and 46 Seconds later...
Day 1 of no methadone was uneventful. I felt pretty close to normal. My stomach cramped all night. Diarrhea in the morning. The hard part was my brain trying to trick me into tapering lower. Im kinda enjoying the brain fog. It slows my brain down enough to help my anxiety. Im thinking ill feel it tonight when i try to sleep. If not, tomorrow. Maybe ill get lucky and never feel it. Doubt it. Time to embrace the suck. Anybody want to trade places with me?