I almost failed yesterday. Only my girlfriend helped me, but I’m embarrassed about how weak I am. Today I will ask a friend who is professional "recovery coach" for her help. I won’t do this alone, and I don’t want to, I want to ask for help, I need to and I choose to. I’m still fighting with myself today, from the moment I woke up, but I found great reason not to quit this goal:
If I will stick to this, if I will live and face the world "cold turkey", this point in my life will be just the beginning of an amazing future I can create for myself and people I love. If I fail though, I’m digging my bright future’s grave. I will peak here and then never achieve anything more, because I will be sick, overweight, without any discipline, motivation and focus, still addicted to some fucking plant controlling my life. Now, I still have choice.