i am so sorry to hear about your cat BT2H.
I understand completely how hard that is.we get so used to having them in our daily lives its like a piece of our heart goes when they go.
I am actually planning to discuss with my psychiatrist tomorrow if its normal to be so hung up on the loss of mine.
he would of been 15 Thursday the 16th.
I buried him at my fathers house and I plan to go dump some milk on his grave.
and I have questioned how insane that is.
in the words of Robert Deniro in meet the parents,"hes a cat for christs sake!"
the last time I was at my psychiatrist I was crying over my dog I lost.
now I wanna talk about my cat!
not my family,my neighbors,school,work,etc.but my pets!thats what made him say he wanted to talk about OCD next visit,and I haven't been back since.
those are the things that make me question my sanity.i cant help it.i loved them.and their gone.and there is nothing I can do about it.and it hurts.
so yeah,i can relate...another reason lifes a bitch.
I have got to pull myself out of this funk I have been in.i refuse to be one of those moms that sits around sulking letting their house fall to shit as the husband struggles to pick up all the pieces.
I don't want that for us,at all.
I have decided I might not be able to breastfeed.
if I don't feel better by February when I deliver I have no choice but to go on some kinda antidepressant.
I hate to say that,but maybe I do have some kinda problem that is out of my control.
so if theres a drug that will get me back to being more upbeat and chipper im going to have to take it.for my whole familys sake.
my very first appointment with my shrink he said it was selfish to not be properly medicated.but I was still in control then,so I didn't get that.
well I get it now,and it is selfish.
I just gotta get threw the next few months before I make and decisions.i may be completely back to myself once im not pregnant anymore,cant wait,im counting the days.
thanks again for the continued support and encouragement.
I cant wait to close this journal either.
I hope within the next 6 months i'll be reading all my whining and shaking my head at myself.