Detoxing - Fentanyl with hell, my life. - Part 28

By lostlygirl · Nov 30, 2014 · ·
  1. Yes, of course quantum physics is a theory, however, quantum particles do behave differently when observed, our minds can hold stuff in a quantum state, and atoms start to disappear when one gets closer to them. These have all been observed, and very well documented.

    The whole point was exactly that we cannot see the point.

    I think deeply, I always will. It's a part of who I am, a part of what makes me in unequally me. Do I think about this stuff all the time? of course not. Do I think about it enough? of course.

    My experience tells me that proper boundaries can only be put in place when we innately love ourselves. Show me a person that abuses drugs, who is addicted to drugs, and I will show you a person who at the very core does not love themselves. Every. Single. One.

    Because ultimately, if you love yourself fully, without restraint and with clarity, it changes everything.

    Hugs, xxoo


  1. Jungledog
    I agree with the loving self part but I don't think it is an all or nothing point. Despite all that has happened to me, I did not begin to abuse drugs until my life literally became too much to manage. I was caring for a father who at the time we thought was dying, my husband was being an asshole and my marriage was crumbling, my kids had significant issues, and then my husband lost his job.

    So my thoughts are people turn to drugs when they go through trying times and FORGET to love themselves. I certainly would not have been able to stop the oxy ON MY OWN if I did not love myself. I would not be able to sustain a 2 month taper if I did not love myself. There is no black and white in this shit just shades of grey. Some addicts truly do not love themselves and never have. Drug use starts young for these people. Others simply stumble along the way. But you are right...the way out is finding self worth.

    Keep thinking deeply my friend and be you,
  2. lostlygirl
    Well, I abused my fucking patches again, so I threw them out. Now I am back at fucking square fucking one and I am so stupidly pissed at myself.

    I guess I can't be trusted with them. Shit...I am so mad at myself!!!!


    Day one of fucking fentanyl withdrawals. Here we go again.
  3. Jungledog

    What happened? What triggered the use? God, I dropped this morning and I have been looking at the bad of kratom with longing. I want that other freaking 1/4 tsp. Crazy shit. I am so damn tired.

    Ok so what is your plan? Cold turkey? Loperamide? Careful with that shit without at least a betablocker. But you know the risks! Why did you toss the Fent and not have your friend hold it?
To make a comment simply sign up and become a member!