I think I am having an allergic reaction to the Loperamide, I am ichy, if I break out in hives I'm fucked.
I will have fucking have to face withdrawals without anything. Fuck, fuck, fuck.
I just didn't want to have a friend hold them, ya know? It felt weak...like some whining weak person who can't even control their own meds, ya know?? So I just chucked them away. Right down the toilet. Every last one.
I think my trigger was a lot of things. I tend to get through crap, handle it just fine, and then the trigger will happen a few days later. Its hard to pinpoint exactly what it is by then, ya know?
I am being careful with the loperamide. What do beta blockers control? Luckily I have a very overall low heart risk, but I know arrhythmia's are a whole different baby. I have very low blood pressure, thin blood, low weight, low overall blood sugar, and average bad cholesterol, but I am not sure if this even makes a difference anyway?
My body is also used to Fentanyl, so I am not sure if that puts me in a lower risk category to begin with?
If I break out in hives I am going to have to take Benadryl, and I HATE having to take Benadryl during withdrawals, it makes withdrawals 1000 times worse. Gggrrrrrr...
lostlygirl added 6 Minutes and 26 Seconds later...
I want to try Clonidine but they won't let me near the drug because my bp in the DR's office is 110/60. They think it's usually lower than that seeing as bp is slightly elevated in a clinical setting.