Wow. I made it to day 4!!! I really can't believe it because I NEVER thought I would be able to make it to day 4 with only Loperamide. Surprisingly enough it has been holding the physical withdrawals really well. So far I have only taken 50 mg (25 pills) and it's looking like this will hold me through 6:00 pm. If can maintain a drop of 5 pills a day I will be really happy.
Jungledog, dating_meth & Jonbenet mom, I cried when I read your posts (what is it about withdrawals that turn me into a blubbering mess?!). When it got really tough in the middle of the night I read all your post's over and over. Drug abuse is just not something I can discuss with anyone without repercussions, not only for myself but also for my kids.
Dating _Meth, OMG! I can't imagine being put into that situation, wow. It kinda scares me that you had a heart attack from the withdrawals, although I am honestly not surprised. There is no way I would've gotten this far without loperamide.
JonBenetMom, I was put on tramadol for a week when I couldn't take ibuprofen due to minor surgery. It really made me loopy, which is surprising considering the dose of fentanyl I was on. How long did it take you to taper? I do agree it's a good idea to get antidepressants for a few months.
JD, I relate to everything you said. Is kratom something that can be used for pain control? Last night was the first night my pain was really out of control. I suspect thats due to withdrawals more than anything else. If I was going to be completely honest with myself my pain is out of control about 5-7 days of the month. It's annoying about 10 days, and bearable the rest of the time. It's a lot worse in the winter, and in the summer I could probably get away with almost nothing. I do know that at times it's a very convenient truth and an easy way to keep taking drugs. It helps my emotional pain far more than my physical pain.
I am really interested in getting healthy and finding other options for managing my pain. I usually eat pretty well, but for some reason I really crave sugar and fats right now. I am trying to steer clear and eat a lot of fruits & veggies, even though it's the LAST thing I feel like eating. I am also trying to keep moving. Ugh. I don't want to do any of it, i just want to crawl into bed and sleep the next 2 weeks away.
You are SO RIGHT about big Pharm. They are not looking for any cures, only maintenance treatments. If I wanted to I could get fentanyl for the rest of my life. That is considered a completely acceptable "treatment" option. My other options? Any other drug I want. What about a cure? Yeah...not in anyone's lifetime, because thats not good for the fucking bottom line.
Loperamide completely erases almost ALL of my physical withdrawal symptoms (thank goodness, because otherwise I don't know if I could do this). That tells me that for at least fentanyl Big Pharm has a completely viable option to help withdrawals thats currently not considered addictive or a narcotic. Its considered safe enough to be a fucking over the counter medication. It's been widely touted in helping opiate withdrawals and yet there are NO clinically controlled studies on it????? Big Pharm has a lot to loose in the discovery of a common over the counter medication that could potentially erase most physical opiate withdrawal symptoms. Add Kratom to that list and it would be their worst fucking nightmare. (Having said that PLEASE do not ignore the warnings about Loperamide causing heart problems at high doses. Fentanyl is KNOWN to do the same, and as Loperamide it is a derivative of Fentanyl it would be wise to take this very seriously).
I am Australian but I am currently living in the US. I moved here in my 20's for college. My family is back home. I live in the intermountain west and getting my prescriptions filled is a nightmare. The other month I was told by the pharmacy that I had to wait 30 days from the day I picked up my medication, not the day it was filledwhich was 4 days after the Dr had approved it. It was bloody ridiculous and completely unnecessary. Im just so ready to be done with all of this. I'm sick of all of it.
I am kinda afraid I am just putting off withdrawals with loperamide. I have to start tapering tomorrow and I'm really worried. I am worried I am just going to switch a fentanyl addiction with a loperamide addiction. I am also going to have to visit that place in my head where I shove stuff. The place I never visit. I'm just going to have to take a deep breath and just go in there. Shit. Im not looking forward to it because it holds all the reasons I love fentanyl. Im just going to somehow get up the courage to take out one item at a time and just deal with it. I have no other option if I want to stay clean.
Im beginning to not feel good. I am achy and feverish all over and I am starting to feel like crap. I don't know if I should take another dose of loperamide now or wait until it gets really bad. I am going to try and wait 90 min (3600 seconds), and push my 6:00 pm dose to 7:30 pm. The good news is that this 24 hour period is over in 20 min and I have survived on 50 mg of Loperamide. Heres to one day less of withdrawal hell. Fuck, I HATE this.