I am at day 3 of withdrawals which are usually the worst for me, and sure enough I woke up with that credit creepy crawly, tingly, electric shock feeling withdrawals give you. I took 20mg (10 pills) Loperamide that I am currently waiting to kick in.
Withdrawals this time around have been super mild, for some really odd reason. I wonder if it has something to do with my attitude? This is the first time I have gone into it thinking "O' well, no big deal....I've gone through this a bunch of times and its really not so bad. I've got through it before, I'll get through it again, no big deal." My focus has been more on my day, and less on withdrawals....in fact, I haven't really spent much time thinking about it at all and its been unbelievably mild.
Of course, for those that are withdrawing from fentanyl there really is the perfect drug. As JD says, I really am in the unique position of withdrawing from a drug using basically a mutated version of the same drug. As waking up this morning in withdrawals tells me, I would be well and truly FUCKED without it. For those withdrawing from Fentanyl I cannot recommend Loperamide high enough. Its a godsend. Just be sure to read the whole journal because there are some serious risks involved that have been discussed.
I am debating whether to go down to the college that I used to work at today to see if they have any classes to teach. I have to go either this week or Monday of next if I want any classes. By now they would have already offered classes to their full-time/adjunct staff and would have received their reply. Thus, right now is when they would be looking for teachers for any classes they have left over. Ugh...I don't want to go. I walked out on them mid-semester, and you don't do that if you want to stay teaching. I am going back there because I promised them I would let them know first if I ever decided to teach again. I also need to know what type of reference I can get (meaning... how pissed are they that I walked out on 7 classes???? But still, they were NOT paying me enough. They were working me OVER a full-time class load but paying me adjunct wages. After my expenses it was actually costing me $1.47 a day to teach!!!!)
I need to work, thanks to my ex loosing a very, very, very good job. Grrrr. I was very much enjoying taking care of my kids. I have started painting again, and am working on my third instructional book.
Luckly, I was/am very successful and have my art in every major department store (Target, WalMart, Sams, kohls, Walgreens, home depo, Lowes, hobby lobby, to name a few) I am an illustrator who works in the gifts & decorative accessories market. I paint the pictures that go on mugs, gift wraps, fabrics, greeting cards, blankets, flags, jigsaw puzzle's etc (I even have a soft toy, lol!). I paint the cute snowmen, Santa's, angels, rabits, etc. I have over 30 Christmas wraps at WalMart alone. I don't sell to WalMart per se, I sell the rights to use my pictures to manufacturers (licensing) who then sell their products to walmart/target/home depo/hobby lobby etc...
Anyway, at least working for me means staying home and painting whilst listening to music. Its pretty fun. However I need the college job right now because it takes time to get new products in stores, therefore it takes time to increase my income from art. I still make some money on the existing products I have, but in order to make great money I always need to be creating new art. I haven't created any new art since 2006 when I decided I just wanted to stay home with my kids, I've just been licensing out my old stuff.
Well...I think if the loperamide starts working I will rip off the bandaide and just go down to the college. Shit...I dont want too! Ugh. I guess the worst thing they can do is say no.......!