I keep thinking that if I just try that nasty shit again, it will be better. That I might get a good piece or something. I know this is not rational. I just can't bring myself to throw it out. Why? Why? I'm tired today. But I have to get through this, I know I can. I've done it before and I know I can do it again.
I just got a call about a job that kind of fell in into my lap, and I got the job! I start in two weeks. I'm so excited. So this is my motivation to get and stay clean. It really is my dream job.
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