From controlling, to eventually tapering and to ending my opiate use. - Part 6

By Werecat · Dec 9, 2014 · ·
  1. Hiya Mel and thank you. Yeah I'm stopping the snorting. It's not good for the nose anyway. It makes the nose tender.

    Unfortunately I still need my pills for now for the pain (nothing else works, though NSAIDS do a wee bit), hence why reduction is best (I reduce as my pain reduces) for me not cold turkey. But my time line for stopping is a matter of months. Then I get the joys of being drug free and kicking the addiction at the same time.

    Yup, I will support in return!

    Werecat added 98 Minutes and 3 Seconds later...

    A small update. I've definitely overdone it. Not overdone the drugs but overdone it because I felt better so did more stuff. Yup, I carried too much shopping earlier. The temptation is there to take more because of the pain. But what I really need is to rest a little more again. I think that overdoing is what made me sick earlier.

    Sorry, this also seems to be turning into a health journal as well as drug reducing. Both are linked anyway.

    I think tomorrow it's best if I go for a small walk (no shopping), do some physio then just rest before I end up taking too much or hurting myself.

    It's awkward when you start recovering and feeling better because that's when mistakes can be made.

    Also, is it me or am I writing badly? I feel a bit muddled.

Comments

  1. Jungledog
    Werecat,

    I have found a few things as I tapered down the opiates. First, read about something called opiate-induced hyperalgesia. Essentially, if you stay on opiates for more than a few months, opiates CAUSE more pain. Yes, you read that sentence correctly. Opiates were never created to be used long term. They were to be used for people who were dying of things like terminal cancer and for those with sudden, acute pain caused by things like trauma. When you use opiates long term, they literally crank up the level and duration of your pain. So while you think that you need opiates and that your pain can't be managed without them...this belief may be wrong.

    As I have tapered and jumped, I have had the opportunity to evaluate my pain better. I do have severe pain days and yes, I think that there will be days that require narcotics. But these days are much less often than I initially thought. My pain off these damned pills DOES seem to be less...or if not less at least it seems like it is more manageable than I thought when I was on them. When I was taking them this "belief" that I needed them or was somehow entitled to them because of my pain led me, in my case anyhow, to taking way more than I should have (or perhaps in your case to snorting them...which lets face it has nothing to do with pain). I guess I am challenging you to think a bit about your true need and to be open as you taper to the fact that you really may not need the opiates. Cmenot, challenged me early on to consider the same thing and I was resistant. But she was right. The opiates were causing me more pain and getting off them has not necessarily reduced my pain but it has made me aware that I can manage it most days with alternative methods. Yoga, exercise, and gabapentin are my go to methods.

    Just things to consider. You are an individual and we all have different needs. But read up about that phenomenon. Trust me when I tell you the drug companies were none too happy when that research hit the literature...that their drugs CAUSED more pain!!! LOL

    Love to you, my friend. Chronic pain is no joke.
  2. lostlygirl
    Werecat,

    Thank you so much for your support on my thread, you have a kind soul, and are a great addition to the boards.

    I would write whatever moves you. Oftentimes we categorize addiction into its own little box, when in reality it is very much tangled into our everyday lives. It's very much a part of carrying in the groceries, and what we eat, and how we think. That's why addiction is so very sticky....its difficult to know exactly where it began or where it ends, let alone dealing with the tangled mess in between.

    It's only when we truly begin to question every thought, every action, and every feeling and start asking ourselves why, that we start to untangle the mess. Often times we can untangle one area of addiction in our lives just to make a bigger mess in another causing us to retrace our steps to undo the knot. Its exhausting, frustrating, soul wrenching, and hungry work. Its untanglement literally permeates throughout our lives.

    But, one day the tangled ropes of addiction will be loose around our feet, and we will step free and on to the future that awaits us. This I know.

    Besides, I love hearing about peoples day to day lives, I think it's really interesting! :)
  3. supermono
    Hi Werecat,
    I am so glad you started your own thread. Thats great. I have read all your posts. You are not alone my freind. It doesnt matter what you have taken and how much. my habit hasnt been massive this time either but its taken me two months to taper down and I,m nearly there. It been my own hell and each of us has our own.I also have pain in my back so i know how that feels too. Try to keep off the cafeine I feel it makes any wdrls worse. I havent had a coffe for weeks and I do miss it but my recovery is more important.
    Do you have any support from freinds and family etc. This will really help you. I wish now I had put some support systems in place first before I started because for me being around people takes my mind off any wdrls and self talk. I have had one panick attack in my life and several near misses. Its horrible isnt it ? I do have a few valium stashed but they are for an emergency only. I also get bad anxiety but the neare I get to the end of my taper the less anxiety I get. LUTW has helped and accupuncture too. I know how hard this is but you can get well like millions of people have. It does get better, just stick to a very slow taper if you can just as I eventually did. I went to quick to begin with then slowed everything right down so I have had very little wdrls and it keeps me from bad self talk causing me depression and anxiety. You can do this . I will be fighting with you on this one right by your side. Keep it simple. One day at a time. Good luck, Peace and love Mono :applause:
  4. lostlygirl
    Are you doing ok? I miss you!
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