Re: I really need some support, please help me (Heroin)
Well today is day 9. I woke up at 430 and couldn't get back to sleep so I just got up and decided to deal with it. Yesterday my anxiety was through the roof. I took some klonopin but found it wasn't very effective at helping me. I need some xanax because that helps me deal with my anxiety much better. Unfortunately, my source is dried up for that right now. Hopefully, in a few days that will change.
Today I have a house to clean. One of my previous customers contacted me and asked if I would come clean for her. I of course, jumped at the opportunity. I am tired though and I have no motivation. I don't even want to shower as gross as that sounds. I always have good hygiene but my lack of energy is keeping me from wanting to do anything. I'm hoping to start exercising soon once I get over this crap.
Some of my symptoms are still lingering like erratic body temperature, insomnia, terrible depression, anxiety, and so forth. Today I have cravings for something, anything. I wish I had some suboxone left because it helps my cravings but prolongs withdrawals. So, I really don't think that is a great idea overall.
I don't really want to move from my couch. I need motivation to get through the next few hours and clean this house. I wish I could put it off until tomorrow. But then tomorrow would come and I'd probably feel the same way. I want this feeling to end.
I made the mistake of watching Black Hawk Down last night and as a result all of my PTSD symptoms came back. i really can't watch war movies as they remind me of my deployment to Iraq. I've had much therapy for this and I find that nothing works to alleviate the symptoms. Time is the only thing that helps. Although the memories don't fade time still does help. I won't be watching any war movies again anytime soon.
Well, that's about it for today. Still struggling but doing this. Thank you again to all that have been supportive minus a certain someone on my thread whom I hope leaves my thread and finds someone else to harass.
I really need some support, please help me - Part 103