Re: I really need some support, please help me (Heroin)
Ugh I'm so aggravated because I just wrote a really long post and it didn't post right. I really don't feel like writing everything over again. I will just summarize what I wrote.
Long story short. I showed up at my doctor's appointment with my psychiatrist Thursday and was told that she is no longer seeing me and that my care has been transferred to the Sepulveda VA. So, I was not seen nor were my meds refilled. I think it's interested how this is the doctor that admitted me against my will to the hospital and now she's totally washed her hands of me and is not treating me. So, as of right now I have no doctor. The soonest appointment I could get at the Sepulveda VA was December 2nd. So, I will run out of one of my prescriptions on Sunday. I don't know what I am going to do. I am going to have to show up to Sepulveda and see if they will see me on an emergency basis. I don't know what else to do.
As far as the outpatient rehab at Sepulveda, I have to be on methadone or suboxone to take part in the program. The doctor would not put me on suboxone because I was told that I am too high of a risk and that I need to be monitored everyday and that's why I need to be put on methadone. I politely explained to him why I didn't want to be on methadone and that I was unable to come to the clinic everyday and he simply did not care. He was a big asshole. He pretty much told me that I won't get clean without methadone and that he's not willing to help me. So, it's safe to say that the VA is not going to help me.
So, I took it upon myself to search for a doctor that prescribes suboxone close to my house and I found one. I have to check and see how much it will cost for me to be seen. Right now I don't have any extra money. The VA is obviously free medical care. Maybe that's why it's such poor care.
I will also see if this doctor can help me get into an outpatient rehab program. I don't know. I am trying though. This all takes time. It doesn't happen overnight. Doctor's are loaded up with patients, there are wait times to get into clinics, etc. I'm doing the best I can with the resources I've got.
I will keep trying. As I stated in the post that got lost, I want this to be a success story. i want to look back at this and say I made it. I want to be the one that succeeds. I really do.
As far as the last few posts goes and all the religion talk. I have no energy to address it all. All I can say is I told my mom at the age of 8 that I didn't believe in god and i wasn't going to support my family's religious practices. My mother supported my decision and I have never changed. I don't support organized religion and I never will. So, have your disagreements somewhere else besides my thread.
Anyways, I have a migraine and I am tired. I just wanted to update really quickly and I apologize if it all doesn't make sense. I don't feel well. I will continue to update. I will make it through this. I am a trooper and have always succeeded in everything I've ever set out to do. I might stumble but I get back up. I will fight the fight. A soldier never quits.
I really need some support, please help me - Part 115