Re: I really need some support, please help me (Heroin)
Thanks beach walk. I just really want to be with my dog though in the comfort of my own home. I feel so sad that I haven't talked to my guy. I am so worried about him and his family. He's going through so much. He works an insane amount of hours, we are long distance. I feel like maybe he's losing interest in me or that's my mind playing tricks on me. I don't know. Maybe my health stuff is too much for him to handle? i don't know. I just want to hear his voice. He's so comforting to me. I'd be so much more calm if I heard from him right now… so sad.
I don't want to get back on anti-depressants. They suck. They don't work for me either. Since I got off of them I've felt much better. Much more intelligent, better memory, etc. I don't really want to go back down that road. I'd be ok getting back on prozac but it makes me lose weight and I am only 112lbs right now. I can't lose anymore. The docs are already really upset about my weight. I keep losing since I've been sick. Can hardly eat right now and the anxiety is making things so much worse and if I get on anti-depressants it will only be worse. THen, I will never eat. Anyways… I don't want to complain too much more. I have already complained enough and you all are so supportive I don't want to be negative for you all.
Thanks for the message though. I am up and all alone and it made me smile and made me think that yeah, you're right he's probably just trying to figure out how to best take care of his family. I just need closure before bed. I need to know he's ok and his mom's condition. This sucks not knowing. IT's so hard. Ugh.
marathonmel7 added 72 Minutes and 8 Seconds later...
And… so sexually frustrated. Being off heroin has made my sex drive sky rocket. I can't keep up. It'd be nice to be intimate with my guy right now. That would help my anxiety. Plus my feelings for him are deep which makes it all the better. But man, after opiates my sex drive is just uncontrollable. Probably TMI for people but what the hell haha. Might as well throw this in there for fun tonight. Although my doc said no sex right now. Yeah right.
I really need some support, please help me - Part 206