ive finally jumped from 20 year Heroin habit - Part 67

By charliecat · Aug 13, 2014 · ·
  1. Hi guys
    I'm back in the thick of another attempt at detox
    I'm at the start of day 2 and all the usual shitty symptoms are here...although I've now been through this many times over the past year it still takes me by surprise how overwhelming it all is

    I can feel as strong and determined as is possible before I start detox but as soon as it starts I turn in to a weak and pathetic loser

    I swear each attempt gets worse

    I'm completely on my own this time...don't know if that's good or bad..my kids are away for one week and I phoned in sick at work so here goes...

    I can't concentrate on anything at the moment..the battle in my head is raging..Will I use..Will I stick it out this time?? I know what I really want just don't seem to be able to get there. One positive is that I am now to sick to go out and hustle for a shot so looks like I will have to lay here and suffer until it gets better.

    Not looking forward to next few days but Here i go again...

Comments

  1. la-di-da
    All I can advise is to minimize the accessibility of opiates. You have the right motivation to start but there's going to be a point in most peoples detoxes where they *decide* to use again (even if only for a minute, which is enough to ruin what otherwise might be successful detox). That's where you have to second guess yourself and set the situation up so that it's very difficult for you to get access to gear and works.

    I know that for myself there's NO WAY IN HELL I could go through a detox when I knew i could get on easily. It's just too much to ask of myself, so I have to delete all numbers, give my cash and cards to someone I trust, do good shop for groceries, bunk down in bed and hold for the ride.

    I really wish you all the best, I know all too well how soul destroying detox from H is and am sending good vibes your way! Hang in there!
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