I'm back. Here's what's happened since I last posted - some bad, but a lot of good too.
I was on subs for the past two weeks (extremely small amounts) and I thought I was ready to jump off.
I jumped off and felt HORRIBLE - so I made a huge mistake - I got 4 30 mg roxies because I convinced myslef I was withdrawing from the subs.
Now I have nothing - no bupe or no roxies - it's been 3 days off subs and 1 day off roxies and I feel - well, alright.
Not good, but not horrible either.
I'm still committed to finally getting clean. The desire is still strong. Now, I have no bupe and no oxy and I think I can get through this!
Any words of advice / wisdom are greatly appreciated.
FightinTheGoodFight added 8 Minutes and 37 Seconds later...
I should add, through all of this, the hardest part about getting completely clean is WORK!
I have to remain productive at work - I have to talk on the phone and enjoy being around people. When I'm not on the pills, I just feel like shit and my performance suffers!
I know the answer is take time off from work, but it's not that easy. It's a very busy time and I can't afford to just leave for a week or two right now.
Seems like the worst Catch 22 possible.