Well, I did pretty good - however, I have 3 days left until my next refill. I am SOL. I don't have a single pill and I feel awful. I've pooped about 3x now at work. I slept well last night as I took a couple 1 mg ativan. I have just enough of those to hole me over until my refill to ensure I get some sleep.
We always have great intentions when we get our refills, but I don't know how it's going to go. Wrapping my mind around letting 2015 be the year I deal with my back pain issues the absolute right way. More chiropractor visits, motrin as needed (which isn't the best either - but at least you can get those OTC). I don't know. This whole dependence on these pills is a whole bunch of fuckery.
sadbutglad added 1380 Minutes and 36 Seconds later...
Today sucks mentally. The bubble guts just come with the territory. I have 2 ativan that I'll be taking tonight which means I'll be screwed for tomorrow as I know 1 won't keep me sleep. Today is Tuesday and refill day is Thursday. I feel clear headed - I guess. It's just an entirely new outlook without my pain meds. As far as pain goes, it's not terrible. Pain was bad yesterday and I took Mortin 800 mg for that. Just bummed out without my meds. It's day 2.
sadbutglad added 185 Minutes and 32 Seconds later...
Today my entire mind is wrapped around hearing from my doctor who will confirm that I can pick up my prescription for Thursday. My man is trying to be encouraging in telling me I don't need these stupid pills, but I can't imagine my life without them. I would totally go to a treatment facility if I could. But my income is much needed in our household and I can't afford to do that. I don't even have insurance. I am paying for the doctor's visits to see the doctor as needed and for the medication.
Yes - it's clear I have a problem. I went to the chiropractor last week and pain is back. To be honest, immediately after my visit, I was happy as the pain went away (well the majority of it). But, now I can clearly recall why I stopped pouring my $$$ into the chiropractor pit. It's temporary and too expensive.
All I have to do is technically wait 1 more day (tomorrow) and I will have my meds. I am mentally not happy without them.