new Journal - Part 1

By longroadhome · Oct 23, 2014 · ·
  1. Let me start by saying that I fell into this knowledgeable of what was happening. Being a cannabis user in my earlier yrs, I knew I had those addictive tendencies. I just thought it wouldn't get me. I lost my mom, and was prescribed Zoloft, for depression, temporarily. It didn't work. Coasting along, 2 yrs later, a surgery, Tyl 3's prescribed. I asked the dr for another couple weeks due to more pain, he obliged.
    What came next was a little blurry, but I do remember a definite spiral, slipping, down... I was having what later was diagnosed as Lupus flares. I was put on pain meds, I think they were Percocet. I was also put on steroids. 8 yrs later...
    When my back pain became too much, they sent for a MRI . The L1-L3, was degenerated, stenosis, slipping over each other. My pain was real, I didn't know how much, but I knew I was incapacitated. Surgery was next. Total open surgery, with cage and bolts. And more pain meds. So..... Has been too real, too scary. There were times I really thought I wasn't waking up. At the time, well, I think I didn't know if I cared. I just wanted no pain, no pills.
    I had a good look at myself recently. Family will do that.
    I started titrating down, planning on my escape from this addiction.

    Things that are troubling to me:
    1) I have discussed titration and my plan of eventually becoming free of pain meds, with my pain mgmt Dr. He said , " I don't think you will ever be able to be totally off of pain management ", and , 2) my spouse is not supportive.

    I am not sure if I am supposed to list what I am on, my thoughts, my plans, what those involved with my life have said. I hope I have done nothing wrong here. I would welcome any support, comments, truths, or insights to said, familiar experiences that I have mentioned.


  1. Jungledog

    I am new too so maybe we can do this together? My thoughts on your concerns:

    1) Only YOU can determine if you can wean down and get off. Pain management does not have to include opiates. I actually think I developed more pain from my opiates and there is research out there that suggests this is true for many patients. You will probably need to find new ways to manage the pain. Acupuncture and restorative yoga has helped me the most. I can suggest a book if you like...I think we are allowed to do that. (I need to read the rules about links again...I can post a link to info on opiate induced hyperalgesia.)

    2) You can do this without the support of your spouse. It would be great to have it but you just need support from somewhere. I would be willing to be part of that support system if you are interested.

    I wish you the very best.

  2. Cmenot
    I don't know why your spouse would NOT support you in this, but you have my sympathy. It would be helpful to know what and how much you take daily and for how many years. Jungledog is correct in that pain medication can cripple your brain's ability to control pain. It makes you super sensitive to the smallest discomfort. A lot of people find that they have LESS pain once they stop taking the opioids/opiates. There are alternative options for pain management. Many Pain management specialists don't see a patient successfully quit drugs, the patient stops coming to appointments and the Dr doesn't necessarily notice or know what has occurred. I don't know about your Dr but most Pain Dr's are very busy seeing 30+ patients on any given day. In any case, don't take that prediction seriously. YOU are the master of your destiny, if you WANT to stop, you will.
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