Thanks ladies for the kind words. In my heart I want to be off it all but I also have come to accept that my pain is forever. That means that I will always need something to manage it. I need to control my use and I am doing that. Gone are the magical days when I could take a few pills just to feel no emotion. Opiates are just a fake escape. Eventually tolerance builds and the fucking bubble bursts. Then you have to finally face your demons instead of numbing yourself in opiates each evening. I am so glad I am back to me. Excelling at my jobs without an opiate crutch to numb the stress. I like me off opiates.
Kratom lasts about 5-6 hours for pain. I still get no high to speak of. I do routinely go many hours over night without any..... 12-16 hours and do not get withdrawal most of the time. But some days I do. Kratom is a weird little plant.
How is everyone doing?