Quitting Oxycodone with Loperamide- My story begins... - Part 57

By Jungledog · Nov 12, 2014 · ·
  1. ^^^OMG I just actually laughed out loud!!! Needed that!!! JD

    Jungledog added 106 Minutes and 44 Seconds later...

    OK. Yeah really dragging. Giving in and taking 1 tsp...5 hours since last one so not good but I really have to get some shit done. This will bring my total daily dose for today to 3 tsp...down a whooping .25tsp from yesterday. Ugh. Feels like a fucking snail crawl to the finish here...there better really be some damn nice roses at the end. :)

    But I did manage to go down. Now tonight I will knock myself out with gabapentin & restoril and hope for the best. Wednesdays are my most difficult clinical day...just full bore patients at a relentless pace. My plan is to hold at the 1 tsp...no drops tomorrow...not unless there is some miracle and the energy pixies sprinkle me with magic energy dust or some shit. Crap am I tired. Please tell me this will end...someday.

    One very tired JD

    Jungledog added 114 Minutes and 24 Seconds later...

    "Strong Enough" by Matthew West


    You must
    You must think I'm strong
    To give me what I'm going through

    Well, forgive me
    Forgive me if I'm wrong
    But this looks like more than I can do
    On my own

    I know I'm not strong enough to be
    everything that I'm supposed to be
    I give up
    I'm not stong enough
    Hands of mercy won't you cover me
    Lord right now I'm asking you to be
    Strong enough
    Strong enough
    For the both of us

    Well, maybe
    Maybe that's the point
    To reach the point of giving up

    Cause when I'm finally
    Finally at rock bottom
    Well, that's when I start looking up
    And reaching out

    I know I'm not strong enough to be
    Everything that I'm supposed to be
    I give up
    I'm not stong enough
    Hands of mercy won't you cover me
    Lord right now I'm asking you to be
    Strong enough
    Strong enough

    Cause I'm broken
    Down to nothing
    But I'm still holding on to the one thing
    You are God
    and you are strong
    When I am weak

    I can do all things
    Through Christ who gives me strength
    And I don't have to be
    Strong enough
    Strong enough

    I can do all things
    Through Christ who gives me strength
    And I don't have to be
    Strong enough
    Strong enough

    Oh, yeah

    I know I'm not strong enough to be
    Everything that I'm supposed to be
    I give up
    I'm not stong enough
    Hands of mercy won't you cover me
    Lord right now I'm asking you to be
    Strong enough
    Strong enough
    Strong enough
    For the both of us

    Not particularly religious (meaning not a big church person but I believe in God) but this song has been giving me strength for the past 4 days. I blast it on my phone, in my car, on ipod while exercising. It is giving me the strength to just pull through this. It really is...I don't have to be strong enough...I just need to trust that what I am is good enough to do this. I am on the bottom looking up...I need to lean a bit on a higher power. I CAN DO THIS!!! Aren't the lyrics pretty applicable to this whole nightmare?

    Hanging on and being strong enough,
    JD

Comments

  1. Hydroxyout
    Applicable, yes but I think you do this all on your own with your own strength and not with the help of a higher power's strength. Still a nice poem.

    Here's a song I like.

    Gojira - "Esoteric Surgery"

    You have the power to heal yourself

    All illness can be healed
    The cell regenerates
    Disambiguated situation
    There is a secret code
    In the structure of the mind
    You have the power to heal yourself

    Flesh bodies mute and blinded
    Roaming uncertain, lost
    Infected misinformed
    Releasing a black enormous insect
    Out from the chest
    Archaic form disease

    Esoteric surgery a dissection of the soul
    Unsuspected precise power
    On the wounded astral body
    Projected beam of light

    All illness can be healed
    The cell regenerates
    Disambiguated situation
    There is a secret code
    In the structure of the mind
    You have the power to heal yourself

    Suspended floating in empty spaces
    Descending swift like a fire running down
    Obstruction disintegration life force
    Overcoming all circumstances
    Release the pain
  2. JonBenetMom
    Child turkey is so NOT vegan.
    I am tired- I literally rode roller coasters all day. Proud I was a good mom and held my taper.

    Heres my contribution to the JD wall of poetry :)

    Thanks for brightening up my world JD and Hydroxyout and Lostly and all

    Invictus
    BY WILLIAM ERNEST HENLEY
    Out of the night that covers me,
    Black as the pit from pole to pole,
    I thank whatever gods may be
    For my unconquerable soul.

    In the fell clutch of circumstance
    I have not winced nor cried aloud.
    Under the bludgeonings of chance
    My head is bloody, but unbowed.

    Beyond this place of wrath and tears
    Looms but the Horror of the shade,
    And yet the menace of the years
    Finds and shall find me unafraid.

    It matters not how strait the gate,
    How charged with punishments the scroll,
    I am the master of my fate,
    I am the captain of my soul.
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