Red Rock thought he would post an update after seeing Dickon's latest update.
Well Red Rock is coming up on the 21 month mark of recovery and is enjoying every bit of it. He has no worries about using anymore. They always told him in NA something about "the addiction is doing pushups and if your not always working on your recovery, it will kick your ass" or something to that sort. For Red Rock, that statement couldn't be more false at this moment in time. He has no desire to even want to go back to using. In fact, he was just thinking the other day, why the fuck would he want to numb out things he experiences in everyday normal life? It makes absolutely no sense to want to do that anymore. For him, experiencing life and just living life is pure beauty in joy in itself.
Since his last update, he has used absolutely no substances at all. He was planning on having a psychedelic/mdma combo for new year's, but things didn't work out so he will just wait until another time. Speaking of New Year's, Red Rock actually spent an enjoying night with the family watching his favorite college football team (Virginia Tech) kick some Tennessee Vols ass (sorry Rok I had to throw that in there :laugh. Now some people might say why would a 23 year old want to hang out with his folks on New Year's? Red Rock was thinking how his parents are starting to get older now and that he wanted to spend some quality family time with them. He had been numbing out all emotions/feelings/avoiding family time for the past several years so he figured he would enjoy his time with his family.
As for school and work, I am currently working an internship as a Network Admin. This job fucking is sick! It doesn't even feel like a job as the work atmosphere is fun and the stuff that I am doing makes it not even feel like a job. PBX phone systems, desktop and remote support, scripting, and tweaking the IIS as well as monitoring productivity are a great start for things to learn as my first internship there. I am still going to school as well so have been slightly more busy than usual but I am more than done with the internship. I am hoping they will want to hire me either part time while I continue in school or once I graduate in another year and several months.
Oh one thing I wanted to mention. I went to an extended family get together for the holidays. Now based on my past and how my social skills were before, I always felt awkward and dreaded these type of events. Well they can still be boring at times but you know...It was quite enjoyable actually and amusing since just about everyone was drinking and damn old people when they are drinking can say some funny shit. Anyways, I found that I was able to socialize far more easily than in the past. I chatted with my cousin for a good 30 minutes on how virtualization has become the hottest thing in the IT industry and talked to a couple of uncles about sports for a while. I even chatted with my 94 year old great Aunt and she was telling me about some of her experiences during WWI and WWII. I just thought it was cool that normally I would shun away from trying to talk to my great Aunt about her experiences as in the past, I didn't give a flying fuck. Now, I was grateful to hear about some of the things she has experienced in her lifetime so far.
I don't know how much longer I will keep writing in this thread. Probably once the 2 year mark is hit, I will request it to be closed unless something really significant comes up.
Anyways, if anyone has any doubts about overcoming opiate addiction, or a recent relapse happened, please read this whole thread. It is proof that joy can come out of being in recovery.
EDIT: I forgot to add that Red Rock is no longer on the Vivitrol extended release naltrexone shot. It has been 37 days since he last had his shot meaning that if he were to take opiates now, his receptor sites would be so sensitive it would take such a minute quantity to feel the effect. He figured he was going to need to come off the shot anyways at some point in his life (unless he wanted to stay on it the rest of his life and in which case, it would be very costly.) Red Rock thinks he can do without that shot now since he is so far into recovery. Since this is the first he has ever been off the shot, he is hoping to hell that cravings and whatnot do not start up again. So far so good.
Relapsed...Moved on past the 18 month mark of recovery...Now what? - Part 23
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