Re: The Beginning of Her End to Addiction/Incredibly Rough Day Today.
Hey friends and lurkers,
Kind of lots of news. Been a bit crazy and a proper update has been impossible to accomplish.
On the home-front: I've realized I cannot spend any time at home while he is here. He stalked me for a few nights but the last two nights he left me totally alone while I slept at my sister's house.
My daughter actually slept with me and my son stayed at home with my husband and mom.
I've been taking her to school first thing in the morning and then going back to our house to take care of my son. Then I drive back to pick up daughter, do homework, make dinner and when my husband gets home, I've left back to my sister's house.
So far, so good. I could honestly do this indefinitely.
Recovery-front, I've started my intensive outpatient program at the mental health clinic by my house.
M-TH 9-12. For the diversion option through the board of nursing I have to do this for 6-12 weeks and then I can begin practicing as an RN again!!! I will have the narc restrictions but I'm sure I'll find something eventually.
So I do the outpatient rehab for 6-12 weeks, then groups once or twice a week for one hour, one meeting weekly, twice a month UA's, lots of journaling and "homework" for the board. Once I start to practice again, I will have the narcotic restrictions on me for one year.
The probationary period here is three years long and after successful completion, I will have NO "dings" on my license! This fuck-up does not have to follow me around forever. I'm so fucking happy, you guys!
I will be signing my contract for the program on Monday. I haven't been letting myself dwell on the nursing too much just because there was so much unknown. Between this and my husband leaving me alone and accepting that we are not really together anymore, I feel as though I've had two huge weights lifted from my chest.
I've noticed my depressive periods becoming less and less frequent, too. You guys! Honestly, when I was having my darkest times freaking out about my license, you guys were here to calm me and help me think rationally when rational thought felt impossible.
I can't begin to convey with words the love I feel for everyone on this forum.
Everything is just starting to happen but it's happening! And I'm clean and sober and I feel fucking excellent.
The Beginning of My End to Addiction/Incredibly Rough Day Today. - Part 28