Thank you Cmenot...i do thank my sister. I am very grateful to her for everything.
But fuck it hurts. I hate it. It's so confronting living here alone. I feel like a bad parent. I feel guilty for all the wrong ive done.
I feel the decline starting. Anxiety. Depression. Lack of motivation.
So I went to the Dr. I'm back on anti depressants...that's fine. I see the psychologist next week...i think talking will help.
I need to get more comfortable with myself...i think that's the main problem...Self loathing is creeping in.
I'm going away for the weekend to spend time with good company. I will distract myself and enjoy my time with friends.
I've got to push through and start to enjoy my own company...it's not fucking easy