The other journals on this forum inspired me to try my own challenges.
Nobody in my life knows about my relapse to cocaine, I have to try and hide this fight. Hopefully this journal can be an outlet.
I have withdrawn opiates in the past and never touched them again. But the mental challenge of coke is harder for me.
Compared to others I might sound like a pussy but I am really afraid when the coke runs out. And today I have let it run out because its controlling my life.
For my heart and my nose, for my bank account and my mental health. I have to try.
Have been on half to 1 gram a day for a few months. Now going to zero to see how it feels.
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