Hey friends! I'd like to share with you some of my trip that happened yesterday. I took 5.6g fresh Psilocybe cubensis (equivalent to ~0.56g dried). Please note this was the PESA variety, VERY potent, not your typical "cube". I came home, replenished vitamins and minerals, unpacked the mushrooms and went for it. Smell was intense, taste was strange, but not unpleasant. I laid down and listened to some chill music. I soon began feeling my jaw tremble. Soon my entire body was having these trembling attacks (like when you have fever). I was nervous, but not anxious. I didn't overthink it and decided to trust the mushroom. I was relatively chill and waited for a change in mind state. There came a point where it felt good to finally turn off the music and get silent. The come-up was also pretty long. May have lasted 45 - 60 minutes. I felt like it was a decent dose, mild visuals were present, it was easy to stop feeling my body, etc. Much more potent than your typical cubensis. I felt I was in it already, but was a bit confused. I thought "what am I supposed to do now?". Nothing really seemed appropriate, so I tried to chill even more, and a few minutes later I began having a slight sense of direction. I could feel my mind "dissolving", I knew what was happening and tried to meditate through this all. There were all these words and thoughts passing by, but I was trying to focus. This first part felt more on the "dark" spectrum, but I wouldn't label it as negative, it was still manageable and I would say even mostly neutral. I visualized the state of dissolved mind I was in, and how it then comes back and creates the structure of my ego (and world as I know it) back again. I have realized the potential of such dissolved mind and its capabilities. Our normal state is a lot of the time a bit too rigid. At one point I sat up, closed my eyes and meditated. My body felt like it has dissolved and I was in a trance-like state. It was very similar to a sleep-wake transition, mild noises from outside kept "waking me up" slightly, creating tiny waves on an otherwise totally calm surface. Very deep meditative state, I could feel my mind being defragmented automatically. After this I laid down and heard tinnitus (strangely, at times it was like nitrous oxide sounds). I've realized I could manipulate its frequency. When the frequency went down, I was seeing a tornado-like flow of energy with larger diameter, when I brought the frequency up, the diameter got smaller and energy flow got much faster (sounded sorta like jet engine). I've spent a few minutes focusing on this energy flow. It was also a meditative state, letting the energies in my being flow freely, without any restrictions. Expelling all the bullshit, making me more complete. The "good" and "bad" stuff got dismantled into strands, and the tornado was taking up the strands from both the good and the bad and woving them together into something non-dual. Being complete means to embrace both the good and the bad - as one. After this I opened my eyes and just laid in bed. Felt cleansed, renewed, like a child. Connected to my heart (emotions). As if all my reset buttons were hit, it felt very healing. When I was smiling or making faces, it reminded me of how other people make faces and I felt like them. To be more precise, multiple different faces could be felt at different points. As far as I can recall, all were feminine. Probably has something to do with the gentleness and beauty of the female face, and I felt certain attributes of these on my own face. To be specific, I felt the face of my ex-GF, one girl I have no idea who she is, and at least one other that I can remember. Generally, my body image was greatly improved. When I stood up it felt like the mushrooms fixed my bad posture to an extent. I've been having all these amazing thoughts, insights, and fun time overall just pondering. I felt differently about people. I felt empathy instead of bitterness and distrust. I went downstairs to see my mom. We talked for a bit, I could clearly feel how caught up she was in her default mode network. As we were talking she kept interrupting me without listening, etc. It didn't feel good but whatever. I went for a walk outside, which felt refreshing, everything was a bit more alive and immersive, I still didn't feel completely "in place", still a bit shattered, but I was managing it quite well. At the end I've had 2 beers and a dinner which finally stopped all the effects, I was back to ground zero again. Felt a bit exhausted, but it wasn't too bad. This was my first trip after more than a year of abstinence. I have learned so much about consciousness, philosophy and the mind in the meantime. I have grown and moved so much as a person. And it was the right time to take it. I could feel how different my attitude was during the experience. I wasn't taking anything too seriously, I took it easy, some meditation skill also helped. Before I tended to struggle with these experiences. I was confused and didn't like it. This time I even embraced the confusion. All the work was SO worth it! I feel like I'm really getting closer to true mystical consciousness. Getting familiar and okay even with strongly altered states of mind is very important. If you can handle psychedelic experiences, you are more likely to handle everyday life well. If you struggle with these experiences, feel confused and "dissolved", you might still be living in a paradigm that doesn't let you open up fully to the experience. Mental walls we create are an obstacle and prevent us from receiving the amazing healing these plant medicines can give us. It's not to say the experience was easy, I have struggled at certain moments, but remained calm. I knew it would all pass. I also got the insight that you don't have to DO anything during the experience. The mushrooms will do all the healing for you, automatically. Just don't stand in the fucking way when the medicine wants to do its healing. If you resist or try to control it, it'll be like standing in the way of a train. You're gonna get buttraped hard. Just trust it and let it work. I did just that and received the most amazing healing ever. It was healing on an energetic level. Anyone who has experienced that, knows. Others have no idea what it means. But it's very real. You don't deconstruct the psychedelic experience, the psychedelic experience deconstructs YOU. Literally. And that's why it's so healing (or scary). I've had ZERO negative emotions/flashbacks from the bad trip that happened last year. My perspective has changed completely, got over it fully. Even though this was a positive healing experience, it made me more aware how dangerous it might be for newbies to just jump into it. It's a completely new state of mind and a guide is highly recommended. A lot of the time the psychedelic experience first requires you to do some inner work (defragmentation) before it allows you to experience the euphoria and lightness. That way you have earned it and it's something that can last beyond the experience itself. It also showed me that we, humans, are just like other animals. We are emotional beings. We need emotional security, love and all that. Why push it away instead of embracing it? We are MASTERS of isolation. We can isolate sterile cultures, tissues, atoms, molecules. We can isolate practically everything. Even ourselves - from each other, the environment, animals and our higher self. This gave me empathy and understanding for animals like dogs. They are truly connected to their emotions because they don't have a very developed thinking mind. Thinking creates boundaries. There's no reason why we should see ourselves "higher" than other beings. The only thing that's higher is our ego. One does not become a mystic overnight (or "overtrip"). It's a long journey, lifelong I would say, and most of the work is done sober. It's hard work, but that's necessary if you want to master anything. Congratulations if you managed to read the whole lenghty report! I hope you've enjoyed it, gained insight, and I hope this will help some fellow psychonauts navigate their trips better. Take care!