Hi all, I am really new to this so am looking for some help. For the last ten years at least, I have had a difficult relationship with alcohol. Its no coincidence that I have been also struggling with depression and anxiety since my teen years. Booze helped me through, gave me the confidence to head out of the door. However, when I finally was diagnosed with Bipolar disorder nearly three years ago, I was warned that I needed to knock the drink on the head as it would not mix well with my medication. That was easier said than done and I carried on drinking. For a couple of years my body took a real beating and my behaviour was getting out of control. Nearly a year ago my medication ran out and I could not get a repeat prescription. As a result I drank more. About four months ago I decided to have a look into other ways of medicating myself other than alcohol. This is when I ordered my first batch of Kanna, despite reading some pretty mixed reviews of it. At first I was insane and insufflated it. My sinuses still have not recovered fully. Later, I took 500mg with some gum and chewed it. I find that sometimes it can make me feel quite sick but I found that the overall effects a good. After about 15 Minutes, I get a slightly strange stoned but speedy feeling, this gives way to a very relaxed sensation. I can sit back in a chair and feel my muscle tension leave me. The temper that has always simmered under the surface is gone and the anxiety too. After a while I can become quite chatty and less insecure.Also, I found that it was really easy not to drink and had a month without a drink. It suppresses my appetite too, which for me is great! To me it feels like a very amphetamine like sensation. As a result I have been taking Kanna regularly most mornings. I had read that Kanna had reverse tolerance, but in my case I did not find that to be true. Indeed, I started to need a higher dose every day to get the same effects. In that case I started looking round for something that I could take in order to have a break from the Kanna, and I ordered some Kratom. The first time I took it, I was not hugely impressed, but I persevered with it. I find Kratom more difficult to describe... It does reduce my anxiety greatly and does give me euphoric feelings, however, I am still aware that my mood or temper is there and is likely to come through at some point. It has helped me with drinking too. I have tried mostly white vein strains and have dabbled with red vein and have enjoyed both, more so the white though to be honest. I have ordered some Phenibut and some Kava so am looking forward to trying those. I suppose that I am really looking for something that I can take whilst I am out and with people that are drinking that will stop me from feeling the urge to head for the demon booze, or at least help me cut down on it. Any advice would be greatly appreciated!