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Pass drug test for methamphetamine in system using baking soda in a few hours right here

Discussion in 'Drug testing discussion' started by DangerSauce, Aug 25, 2017.

  1. DangerSauce

    DangerSauce Newbie

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    I'll just tell ya how "my buddy" *cough* supposedly did it exactly maybe a few hours ago. He or She has done this 9 times now over a 5 month span on felony probation. When done correctly, he or she has never had any issues walking out the doors after submitting their urinalysis sample for the 10 panel / ETG test.

    *I am a 5' 10" male. I weigh 180 and I am 30 years young.

    Relationship Status: Single

    *This process is perfect for those who call testing facility every morning to find out if their number, color, whatever is called random drug screen . As long as you have a 5 hour, sometimes as little as 2.5 hour, window before producing a sample.

    * Make sure to have baby wipes or 2 rolls of toilet paper.....and ladies, I'd be wearin them period panties.

    Step 1) If you are taking the test at 1:30 p.m., stop smoking, rolling, canoodling at 8:30 a.m. (5-6 hours before). And I'm being 100 on that, I have been smoking for 2 weeks straight now and have only stopped to take 3 seperate 8 hour naps......and 5 hours before the test.

    Step 2) Try and hydrate the night before, 12 hours before test is best, while taking 1 multivitamin and/or vitamin b complex every hour . You want to be peeing every 20 -30 minutes with a hint of yellow. So 1 liter of water every 1 - 1.5 hours should get ya nice an bloaded.

    *I am constantly drinking a good amount of water every day, even on days i don't test. Water is good for you. Meth is not good for you. Gotta balance the good and the bad somehow. Little bit of yin, a little bit of yang.

    Step 3) 4.5 hours before the test is taken, quit drinking water for the next hour. You can sip if you must by try not to drink more than 8 oz. during this hour. !!!ONLY STOP WATER CONSUMPTION IF YOU HAVE BEEN FOLLOWING STEP 2 AMD HYDRATING FOR 4-6 HOURS PRIOR. IF YOU JUST STARTED KEEP POUNDING WATER!!! You should be plenty hydrated if you are going on hour 6-8 into pre test hydration. So let's give the ol' bladder a rest.

    Step 4) 3.5 hours before the test, drink 20 oz of water mixed with 1 TABLESPOON of baking soda. Chase it with another 20 oz bottle of water.

    *Try and pee first. It is alright if you shit all over the place uncontrollably. Just know, the leaking of your ass isn't as bad as it will be in the near future. This journey is far from over. *Evil Laugh*

    *Also, I pre mix my baking soda / water days in advance to ensure it is fully dissolved. Use level or a smidge above level TBSP when measuring baking soda. I have three 2.5 TBSP 20 oz bottles and six 1 TBSP bottles in my closet right now hours after taking my weekly urinalysis. Baking soda and water will not go bad believe it or not. Just shake em up once a day. Shake em real good. Sshhhh don't tell my Mom where I keep them. It doesn't taste as horrible when given time to dissolve completely.....but it still tastes like a smashed ass burger covered in nut butter off the sidewalk in 100 degree heat.

    Step 5) 3 hours before the test, drink 32 oz of water and take 1 vitamin.

    *If urine doesn't have a yellow tint, nut up and chew the vitamin up. Get over it. You did this to yourself.

    STEP 6) Woo Hoo. I love STEP 6)
    2.5 hours before test (this one sucks really), drink 20 oz bottle of water mixed with 1,2, or 3 TABLESPOONS, depending on your weight, of baking soda. Chase it with a 20 oz bottle of water.

    * Under 140 pounds 1 TBSP
    * Between 145 - 195 pounds 2 TBSP
    * Over 200 pounds 3 TBSP

    *WARNING: You can overdose by taking too much baking soda! It can shut down imternal organs if taken in large amounts. Follow weight chart above and use level TABLESPOONS. They don't have to be heaping.

    Step 7) 2 hours before test. Drink 64 oz of gatorade and take 2 vitamins. (This is for color)

    *I like to get two 32 oz Green Apple Gatorades. Flavor is up to you. Don't be a douche and get a Propel. We need color!

    *DO NOT USE LEMONADE MIX OF ANY KIND. Lemon juice breaks down baking soda. Ask your neighborhood crack head about the science behind it.......but leave your wallet in the car......or at home depending on the neighborhood.

    *FUN FACT) About 2 - 2.5 hours before test, you will begin to literally piss out your ass. You know those water cannons used in riots? Yeah, it's gonna be that violent. But that is completely normal, just hold on tight to that toilet for the next 45 min to an hour. Sometimes a lil longer. Everybody's asshole is different.

    Step 8) 1.5 hours before the test, drink 20 oz bottle of water with 1 TABLESPOON of baking soda mixed in it. Chase it with a 20 oz bottle of water.

    Step 9) Continue to drink water at a somewhat normal rate until drug test. I try and drink around 4 to 5 bottles heading to take my drug test in that last 1.5 hours.

    *After you do step 6, the one that sucks, you MUST pee ATLEAST TWICE before taking the test. Good streamed pee's too. Also, you don't want to walk into the facility only having to take a small tinkle or sprinkle. You want to use the 3rd or 4th pee approximately 2 - 2.5 hours after the dreaded Step 6. You should damn near be squirmin out your seat before the test you have to go so bad. You think that would be easy considering all the fluids you drank but you will come to find out that it mostly goes out your bung hole.

    *FUN FACT) Don't ask me how it happened but 1 of the 9 times i did not shit at all. I continued to pee like a Russian racehorse for 2 hours before my test. I believe I used my 9th pee after Step 6 and passed. Just sayin. The baking soda gods were on my side that day.

    *On the way to the bathroom, yell "Walkin the mile......Walkin the green mileee".
    Confidence is key here. You don't wanna sound like a pussy.

    * Sit back, relax, pop open an ice cold Snap App and watch the magic happen.

    And there it is, your step by step guide on how to never take a day off from seeing your friendly neighborhood ice cream man and pass a urinalysis within 3.5 hours. I have passed 9 / 9.

    Just so you don't get startled if this happens, on 2 of the tests I've taken, the pass line was very faint but it was there which means you passed and are free to go. They sent 1 to the lab because I produced back to back faint line samples 2 weeks in a row, that's why my Step 6 bottles have 2.5 TBSPs in them. The results came back and nothing was detected.

    P.S. It is not a smart idea to do this every day of the week due to how much fluids you lose. I did it 2 days in a row and got the worst migraine of my life due to dehydration. Before the 2nd test on the next day, i slept 6 of the 12 hours i was suppose to be hydrating and taking vitamims.

    If you want to spend the extra money, you can get yourself some drug tests for the house. Once you pass and are pissin clean, head on in. I don't waste my money on them because i have seen multiple friends use this method and between 2 - 2.5 hours after Step 6 they pass..... I'd say 95% of the time. 5% of you just got wierd innards. I never said this would make you clean 100% of the time. But the closest thing to it when you only have a few hours to spare.

    It will work. Just don't get lazy on the steps. Follow exactly.

    Boom! On to the next one.....
     
  2. Candace_Lynn_88

    Candace_Lynn_88 Newbie

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    28 y/o from Pennsylvania, United States
    I just tried this and it works
     
  3. DangerSauce

    DangerSauce Newbie

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    Another lil update.

    I have been pushing this method to the limits. Doing it step by step every time. I was up for 23 days and looking pretty rough. The testing facility noticed my loss in weight and junkie appearence and started railroading me with 6 drug tests in a 20 day span. I am now 15 for 15 on passed drug tests. I have decided to lay off the juice, < what the cool kids are calling it these days, for a few weeks to get my head clear and a cavity filled. 5 of the tests had solid lines, 1 had a faint line. But a line is a line and that means I passed. Whoop Whoop.

    Merica. Back 2 back world war champs!
     
  4. Chadalac

    Chadalac Newbie

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    Would this method make it come back xeluted?
     
  5. DangerSauce

    DangerSauce Newbie

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    It won' come back diluted because the vitamins make your urine colored.
     
  6. TheBigBadWolf

    TheBigBadWolf Apprentice Sorcerer Palladium Member Donating Member

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    Bullshit.
    Dilution is measured by creatinine content.
    Please dont act like the godfather of urine analysis because you (claim.to have) managed to dupe a dipstick test.

    No proof for a dubious claim but offering wrong facts as advice. How sad is this?

    Do not do anything the member advises to, you'll get sick for.some days at best, people with kidney diseases are in acute danger following this "recipe".

    BBW
     
  7. DangerSauce

    DangerSauce Newbie

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    I'm pretty sure In the first paragraph it says a 10 panel.....whoch would only be a dipstick test. And I'm pretty sure if someone has kidney disease, they would already know not to try this. And you won' be sick for days. I'm so glad someone who has never tried this is bad mouthing it. Thanks for the advise on a subject you have no experience or knowledge on. Dumb dick. Shut the fuck up if you haven't done it and quit acting like a doctor.