Please share your experiences microdosing with mental illness

Discussion in 'Magic Mushrooms (Psilocybe & Amanita)' started by dethmaskxdivine, Mar 14, 2019 at 2:14 AM.

  1. dethmaskxdivine

    dethmaskxdivine Newbie

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    Microdosing for mental illness more complicated than simple anxiety and depression is contraversial, and so is psychedelic use for the mentally ill in general. There is definitely great possible risk and possible reward mixing psychedelics and mental illness. I have heard mostly skepticism from medical professionals and mostly good things from people who actually do it. Please share your experiences microdosing with mental illness in an effort to hopefully get the most out of it, or maybe inform your decision to stop or not try in the first place.

    I have bipolar disorder type 1 and macrodoses of psychedelics have helped me immensely. I am on day 2 of microdosing with psilocybe cubensis and I am having a very bad time. Yesterday I began with 250mg ground up in a capsule at about 5 in the afternoon right after work. I took this first dose in the afternoon after work because I didn't want to take it before going to work without knowing exactly how it would effect me. About 20 minutes later I felt the anger I had been embroiled in that day melt away and I almost cried (of relief). I began to do some homework for History 102 while listening to an awesome beatdown band called Traitors.

    I began to feel a strong bad vibe, I was put in a dark place that was the exact same feeling as some downward mood swings I get sometimes due to my bipolar disorder, not reminiscent of a bad psychedelic trip at all. The past few months I've been dealing with mood swings very rarely if at all (I am doing this to try to resolve anxious and anti-social symptoms) so this is very concerning. I considered maybe the slow angry heavy music effected my mood. I listen to this music regularly and it never has a negative effect on my mood like this, but I had to consider the psychedelic golden rule of set and setting so I changed the music to something more pleasant sounding, CHON but this didn't help. This also occurred around sunset/darkness which has a downward effect on my mood, although less so lately.

    Homework seemed more mentally draining. Eventually this feeling passed over about an hour and I felt comfort spending time with my wife after she got home. After I got out of the dark place I spent a few pleasant hours watching 72 most dangerous animals of Australia and went to sleep. Sleep came easy and I slept well, not waking up in the middle of the night or anything although I did wake up with a headache.

    This morning, not making any conclusions on a trial of 1 I gave it another go. I woke up at 7am and ingested another 250mg capsule and went to work. On my drive to work I felt an upward manic moodswing. I happened to be listening to heavy shit this time also, but this was Enterprise Earth, their music is faster and less downbeat, empowering as fuck which is what I felt. This did not last though as I leveled out more or less when I got to work within 20-30 mins. Maybe an hour or so passed until I felt the same exact nasty, dark vibe from the day before. The rest of the day (right now still) I've been back and fourth between this really bad vibe and feeling meh, with very little good feelings in between.

    I am rather surprised at my bad experience so far because bad macrodose trips are very rare for me and when they do occur it is normally only part of the trip and some good does come out of that suffering. This does not feel like beneficial suffering it feels more like exacerbation of my mental issues. Because of this, I may try doses of 500mg and 1g. I've heard the idea thrown around that smaller doses can be more difficult for some people because having one foot in the psychedelic world and one foot in the normal world can be more distressing than jumping right in. What do you think? Please share your experiences microdosing with mental illness.
     
  2. Sephiroth

    Sephiroth Silver Member

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    I'm not a doctor but I would say what you're doing is risky and dangerous. Mental illnesses should not be self-medicated, you can harm yourself and the people around you. You better ask your doctor about this, have in mind that there's a high chance you will have to say goodbye to drugs for good.
     
  3. curious_38

    curious_38 The Wizard of the Creek Silver Member Supporter

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    That's really calming for me too! As well as listening to death metal. That's what I do to calm down.

    In all seriousness @Sephiroth is right about treatment of mental illnesses by yourself is really dangerous without medical supervision. Way too many horror stories about people who did exactly that.

    I don't at all agree you'll have to say goodbye to drugs altogether but, self diagnosing and self medicating is extremely irresponsible when mental illness is involved. Use psychedelics for fun and not as a viable treatment for bipolar disorder without medical professionals!
     
  4. curious_38

    curious_38 The Wizard of the Creek Silver Member Supporter

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    Here is a good study that finds that that self-medicating is harmful for people with mental illnesses and is something that should be addressed by a medical professional.

    Findings:

    Substance use varies with past year unmet need for mental health care and mental health care use in ways consistent with the self-medication hypothesis. Results suggest that timely screening and treatment of mental health problems may prevent the development of substance-use disorders among those with mental disorders. Further research should identify subgroups of individuals for whom timely and appropriate mental health treatment would prevent the development of substance-use disorders.

    https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC1361129/
     
  5. dethmaskxdivine

    dethmaskxdivine Newbie

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    I've been through all different kinds psychiatric medicines and treatment for 2 years and it's not for me. The winter is usually the worst time of year for me and this past winter off of pharmaceuticals and the occasional psychedelic has been 10000% better than my past 2 winters on pharmaceuticals

    UPDATE: The missing ingredient was cannabis. I am a daily cannabis user and I abstained during these microdosing trials to see what the effects of that alone would be. Upon microdosing mushrooms in addition to my normal cannabis use everything has been great
     
  6. Sephiroth

    Sephiroth Silver Member

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    There are people with mental illnesses who refuse professional help most of them believe in some weird conspiracy by doctors and pharmaceuticals but I can't stress enough the importance of talking of this with your doctor. Tell him about your cannabis use, the psychedelic microdoses you're taking, tell him you weren't happy with your old treatment. I'm sure he'll be open to what you say and reach and agreement. Honestly, a person with a mental illness refusing treatment and doing hallucinogens by their own and cannabis all the time sounds like a terrible idea. At least, have your doctor supervising this. I think this is the best advice you can get here.
     
  7. dethmaskxdivine

    dethmaskxdivine Newbie

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    My doctor is the one who prescribed the cannabis and I did not just refuse and stop taking medication I siphoned off under a doctors care and I feel much much better without pharmaceuticals and it has nothing to do with conspiracy