http:// www. heraldtribune.com/article/20131109/ARTICLE/131109619?p=1&tc=pg Bliss, Black Mamba, Bombay Blue, Fake Weed, Genie, Spice, Zohai, K2, K3, Smoke, Pot-Pourri, Buzz, Spice 99, Voodoo, Pulse, Hush, Mystery, Earthquake, Stinger, Ocean Blue, Serenity, Chronic Spice, Spice Gold, Spice Silver, Skunk . . . That's just the beginning of a long and entertaining list of the many available, dangerous and usually smokable products that Sarasota County Sheriff Tom Knight now wants the county to outlaw. The primary aim is to stop retailers who are selling the products openly, or sometimes not so openly. The proposed ordinance calls them, and others, “designer drugs,” defined as “any capsule, pill, powder, liquid, vegetative material, product, or other substance, however constituted, including but not limited to any Synthetic Cannabis, Substituted Cathinone, or Kratom, designed to be injected, ingested, inhaled or otherwise introduced into the human body.” I wish the ban attempt would work, and maybe it will. Though those products are used to get high, the unpredictable chemicals in some can make people combative or sick or psychotic. But a prominent local lawyer says defense attorneys would have a field day tearing this 16-page proposed ordinance apart. “It's so grossly overbroad,” said criminal defense lawyer Derek Byrd. So much so, he said, that arrests could be made for possession or sale of well advertised “energy drinks” or tobacco. That's because the proposed ordinance has a much wider net than just the long list of names that continues with “Mr. Nice Guy, Mr. Happy, K3 Legal, Sence, Chill X, Earth Impact, Galaxy Gold, Space Truckin, Solar Flare, Moon Rocks, Aroma, Scope, Sky High Atomic, G-20, Guerilla Warfare, Makes Scents, g-13, Tiger Shark, California Dreams, Dank, Bullet, Mind Trip, Voodoo Child . . .” All those would be banned, yes, and the county could even go after landlords of retailers who sell them. Many of the products are casually called “spice,” and are smokable herbs treated with chemicals. Some producers call it synthetic marijuana. But as the ordinance says in another long list, this one of justifications for banning them, those chemical-laced products can be far more destructive and problematic and dangerous. One reason, ironically, is that the makers keep changing their formulas. They adopt different chemical mixes to keep ahead of the game as ingredients are banned by state and federal law. Sometimes the makers change labels to list different ingredients, or omit some, to make it tough for cops to know what is illegal. And, of course, consumers have also sought more powerful concoctions, and the products have been competing on store shelves, at least at a few stores. So as producers and marketers keep tinkering with recipes and names, federal and state laws haven't been able to keep up, the Sheriff's Office says. Store owners and their lawyers claim they don't know which ones are illegal, either, especially with some products camouflage-marketed as aromatic potpourri, or incense, or bath salts. Buyers know to take that with a nudge and a wink. The stuff is sold to people who never bought potpourri in their lives. Some are chronically homeless people who make smoking the stuff a daily activity. But they have been joined by an alarming number of young teenagers who convince each other that the stuff can't be too dangerous. After all, it is on sale in stores. So there's the problem. But, is the answer this 16-page local ordinance, which tries to list and detail and outlaw every possible thing a retailer or manufacturer might try to dodge the ban? It's an impressive effort, one that calls for enforcers to look for clues such as whether the product is displayed near products normally ingested or smoked, or with labeling that misleads or fails to list all ingredients, or implies an effect on mood or any other mental effect. But I'm trying to think of any substances sold that don't do the latter. Even laundry detergent is marketed as a cause of ecstatic delight. That result is probably no more likely with “Jazz, Nightlights, Matrix, Hypnotiq, AK47, Maui Wowie, Cloud 9, Daylights, Joker, Dead Man Walking, Brain Storm, Soul Sence, Kush, Kush Mania, Dragons Fire, Lucid, Mad Hatter, Scooby Snax, D-ZL, OGM, Demon, Barely In, Pineapple Express, Haze, Bliss, Blue Silk, Drone, Energy-1, Ivory Wave, Lunar Wave, Meow Meow, Ocean Burst, Pure Ivory, Purple Wave, Red Dove, Snow Leopard, Stardust, Vanilla Sky, White Dove, White Knight, White Lightening, Blizzard, Bonzai Grow, Charge Plus, Charlie Euphoria, Hurricane, Lunar Wave, Ocean, Pixie Dust, Scarface, Lovely Dovey, Aura, MDPV, MDPK, MTV, Maddie, Hurricane Charlie, Black Rob, Super Coke, PV, Peeve, Meph, or MCAT.” As makers will soon pick more new names, the proposal also seeks to target any substances that “resembles a Controlled Substance in its appearance.” Good idea? Well then, does aspirin qualify? “It would allow a ridiculous amount of discretion” by police, Byrd said. That invites discriminatory enforcement that allows police to target anyone they want. The courts frown on that, and on most laws that call for hugely subjective judgments. And yet, really, it usually is evident when people are using stuff to get high, and when manufacturers and retailers are targeting them. So, when the lawyers are done, just maybe the ordinance will be judged in court to be a wonderfully detailed manual that just empowers cops to act on the obvious, and use common sense.