Meth Mountains, and Adderall Alleys.

quick thoughts

Daily dose of fuckery

Okay last time I checked in was a fuck load long time ago and to be honest, I simply got side tracked. I mean that my addiction has gotten to the point where something like DF, a community Ive been active with on many accounts for well over a decade, no longer was important it came to no value at least one part of me said that. What!? How can you say that? Well simple, I cant use DF for procuring substances or the means to get those substances that my addiction has put in front of just...

Oddly enough, my tina addiction is finally getting to the point were the cravings are getting a new dose of medicine that seems to do the trick and is beginning to rewire the rewards connections in my conscious brain to end in not life altering terrible mistakes, that come with using methamphetamine, and then stopping it as well, but instead to a not so comfortable medium without using methamphetamine, but instead ive started microdosing pscyilocyban mushrooms. Trying different strains, Ive...

just another morning

This is some fucked up fuckery, so ive been boss mode on the opiates meaning ive not done them, i do take a 1/16 of a strip every 72 or so hours to help curve anything that maybe sitting, waiting for me to get sideways and punch me right in the addiction kisser. Yeah i know dont make much sense but stick with me here, okay so this is the way i look at it like im a person well so is addiction a big giant working out 25 hrs of the day never sleep monster waiting for me to slip up and destroy...

Odd the words recovering recovery. Whats this even mean? If asked a physician they state it was a stage post medical procedure which ur body heals, usually a timeline and what to expect and how to deal with the varibles as they come. Ask an addict in recovery they might say recovery is a lifetime long abstinence from all mind altering abused drugs, and what about the ones still out there many cant come to a conclusive answer. What happened to me is sorta like i forgot the things needed...

New Day Different Stuff SSDD it used to be, switched the game up, now its a different me. So craziest fail ever; so since idk early 2000s ive had this idea this brand this company i created a logo and i put it on everything i signed posts on here with ive used it as a logo for bags packs its on street signs i mean i put that shit on everything and yesterday my baby momma sends m3 a picture of a clothing company with my logo on it on MTv im like are u fucking kidding me ive been doing that...

Take it back a few years too give you a bit of a backstory, I ran my gamut of addictions with two coming out in front would be the opiates and then the meth and then i stopped using opiates about 80 days ago. I got about 15-20 years iinto my addiction and let me tell you what its been reality check 1,2,1,2.. Like is this for real whats happening or this shit got me all fucked up. No im not reminescing about the good ole times and this is not some glorified junky rationalized bullshit....

...holding on barely but still holding on....

Im slipping im falling i cant get up im slipping im falling i gotta get up!

13 Ive been on here and had 13 years of trophies Moderators i feel i deserve them back because you merged the accounts or whatever it took all my shit.

How can this be im whats that number 70? What is 70, is it your amount of money?, ....No...Trips to rehab n relapse? ....No... Times you have been Narcaned and saved.... No... That number is clean off heroin/fetty 3 day detox no symptoms been off the shit not on a maintance drug either. 20 fucking years and i got off heroin to be san asshole to everyone who said i couldnt. Big middle finger to the haters. 20 years in the game. Walked away no support and not a soul to care.